Whenever I'm throwing trash down the garbage chute or into a dumpster, I all of the sudden am terrified that I accidentally threw out a valuable ring/my cell phone with the trash.

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during texting you set your phone in your lap right before a car is about to pass you so they dont see you texting and driving

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Whatever situation I am in, I always start to invent rhythms with everything i have around, e.g. my legs, voice, tables or sometimes even the ground.

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Open Fridge, look around for few seconds, say to self - 'What the f*** am I doing?'

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Become paranoid that this is not the real world, and instead is some coma induced dream.

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When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

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On YouTube, if someone comments a time in the video (or in the description) I always click it for fun, even if it doesn't work. Like if someone comments "it's 4:12 right now" on a 2 minute video I click the link.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Saying or doing something stupid, then later replaying it in your head and wanting to punch yourself in the face for it, then coming up with different ideas on how you could have been less stupid. -B

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When I go to the bathroom I put toilet paper over my penis and pretend its a ghost

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When I hear the doorbell ringing and I'm not expecting anyone, I turn off the tv/music and try not to make any sound, so they think there's no one home.

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popping the lenses out of 3D glasses and wearing them when your doing homework or studying because it makes you feel smarter.

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Contract my gluteus maximus while sitting for a long time to feel more comfortable.

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whenever I come across a website like this, I try to read through every post as fast as I can. When I reach the end, I feel like I accomplished something but sad I have no more to read.

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Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

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Wasting a whole bunch of time trying to find how to make one and realizing it was at the top and that you forgot what you were going to put in the first place.

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Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

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get scarred shit less when some one burst though your door when it tacky

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When in long car rides I imagine a little man running or on roller skates next to the car. When A car comes he turns into a ninja and can slide under/jump over or cut the car in half.

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wonder how old the people r who right these. im 12

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Close my eyes and squeeze them so I can see colorful stars and galaxies.

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Look up definitions of acronyms in text messages or Facebook that I feel I should know because I'm teenager.

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Spray my perfume under my arms so if I sweat then it smells like perfume.

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You laugh to yourself when you think you are alone in a street but then you notice somebody in a car looking at you.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.