Wonder what I would have said to my dad if I knew he was going to die

thumb_up thumb_down +17

On YouTube, if someone comments a time in the video (or in the description) I always click it for fun, even if it doesn't work. Like if someone comments "it's 4:12 right now" on a 2 minute video I click the link.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

I ejaculate fire and glory

thumb_up thumb_down -61

Contract my gluteus maximus while sitting for a long time to feel more comfortable.

thumb_up thumb_down -133

cut corners when walking not because it's faster, but because it's more efficient

thumb_up thumb_down +60

When in long car rides I imagine a little man running or on roller skates next to the car. When A car comes he turns into a ninja and can slide under/jump over or cut the car in half.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Think that everything has feelings for example, a cushion or a tree

thumb_up thumb_down -40

After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

thumb_up thumb_down -58

avoid going in the handicap bathroom stall because you're afraid someone will see you cause it's so big

thumb_up thumb_down -72

Become paranoid that this is not the real world, and instead is some coma induced dream.

thumb_up thumb_down -86

during texting you set your phone in your lap right before a car is about to pass you so they dont see you texting and driving

thumb_up thumb_down -90

When changing the volume one my computer it has to be a multiple of 2

thumb_up thumb_down -126

go to the bathroom, turn on the hot water, get undressed so that the water has time to heat up

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Sometimes I see on the clock, the seconds needle go back 1 second and then never do that again for the rest of the day/week or whenever I'm staring at the clock for it to happen again. -Mike

thumb_up thumb_down -61

being a mid-teenager, never having a relationship before and don't care at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -129

Saying or doing something stupid, then later replaying it in your head and wanting to punch yourself in the face for it, then coming up with different ideas on how you could have been less stupid. -B

thumb_up thumb_down -133

You laugh to yourself when you think you are alone in a street but then you notice somebody in a car looking at you.

thumb_up thumb_down +90

Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Always look down at the floor or avoiding any kind of eye contact when your getting told off for something really bad

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Create my response for the whole conversation before even having it

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Whatever situation I am in, I always start to invent rhythms with everything i have around, e.g. my legs, voice, tables or sometimes even the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

thumb_up thumb_down -88

Pretend it doesn't hurt when someone I try for rejects me, but it does hurt, a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

I use chopsticks or disposable latex gloves to eat sandwiches, chocolate, basically any finger food, because in my opinion, it's impossible to get that greasy, sticky film off my fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down -71

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.