If someone asks me if I want something and they get up to get it and im sitting down, I say " oh I can get it" eventhough they are already up just to not seem like a lazy piece of shit

in my mind prisms are called pink floyd.

Having cool food in your house and knowing your boyfriend is going to call you around 6 or so, so you start eating said awesome food at about 5:57. That way when your boyfriend asks what you're doing to can tell him you're eating _____ and he'll want to come over.

Whenever I go to a new place, I look around and carefully plan my escape route in case of zombies.

Inspect the mirrors in store changing rooms in case they are one-way glass. Make faces into mirror as if you know they're back there.

Create my response for the whole conversation before even having it

Whatever situation I am in, I always start to invent rhythms with everything i have around, e.g. my legs, voice, tables or sometimes even the ground.

Spray my perfume under my arms so if I sweat then it smells like perfume.

Get annoyed when you are making a new account and it sends you bafk because of credit card or email address

I have a cat that drops on it's side when she sees me coming

(2) When listening to someone I maintain eye contact, but don't actually hear a word they say, just thinking about the eye contact...

Press the Microwave open button at 0:01 to feel like you defused a bomb and avoided that stupid beeping.

Always look down at the floor or avoiding any kind of eye contact when your getting told off for something really bad

FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAPFAP FAP ::TROLLFACE::

When I have a bottle in my hand and nothing to do in class. I read the nutrition facts and ingredients 2 to 4 times until the teacher says something.

When I have a good dream I can't remember it the day after, but I can remember another dream I had a year ago.

I really like taking shits.

Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak

scream after your in the ooh part of achooh when you sneeze.

Pretend it doesn't hurt when someone I try for rejects me, but it does hurt, a lot.

Open Fridge, look around for few seconds, say to self - 'What the f*** am I doing?'

I try to accomplish things while waiting for the timer on the microwave can go off.

whenever I come across a website like this, I try to read through every post as fast as I can. When I reach the end, I feel like I accomplished something but sad I have no more to read.

wonder if anyone's watching you and try to seem like a decent person

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.