Have to catch my significant other when they lie, not because I really care but to prove I'm smarter

I always have excellent manners when eating around others, but when I'm alone I eat like a pig and have no manners.

When I'm walking on the sidewalks, I make a game of how to walk on the pavement squares so I don't step on a line.

I have had a dream where my teeth fall out.

Cope with serious things by not taking them seriously.

Listen to music while browsing the internet, having facebook open in another tab, and randomly you hear facebook message sounds, even though they aren't really there.

Read shampoo bottle when no magazine in bathroom.

I talk to myself while playing games so I don't feel lonley!

I check behind the the shower curtin before I use the bathroom at night.

Cross the street or go some other way to avoid the awkward moment of long lasting side by side walking (a move known as the 'overtake') when walking right behind someone who is slightly slower than you.

When you Sitting on the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

When I'm sleeping, I turn and my bed shakes, and I wake up thinking it's an earthquake.

being super bored at school

Have a dream that you can breath under water and wake up and be very disappointed

If I drop a piece of candy on the floor, I have to drop another piece so it won,t be lonely

turn off the alarm clock one minute before its goes off when you wake up in the morning

realize you are saying your thoughts outloud.

Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

when I have to shred important documents I am still not satisfied that I even burn the shredded paper

Check an insane amount of times to see if the door is locked, then finally get back to jerking off.

Smile like a damn dork when I watch romantic movies.

Think someone's watching me so I do cool stuff to impress them just in case they are

When you think you don't hear someone, but as soon as you say, "what?" and they start repeating it, you realize that you know what they had said. But then you don't want to be rude, so you let them finish.

"????????? ???? ?????! ??? ?? ???????? UH1 HUEY!!! ??? ?? ???????? ??????? ??????????? ?????, ????????? ?? ??????? ? ??????????????? ???????!!! ?????? ????, ???????????????? ?? ???????, ?? ?????? ??????? ?? ????! ???? ???????????? ???????, ????? ??????? ???? ??? ?????????, ? ??????????? ?????, ??? ????????? ??????? ??????????? ?????!!! ? ??? ?? ????? ???? ??????? ??????????? ??????????. ???????? ????????,???? ????, ??? ??????? ?????? ??? ????? ??? ????? ???? ? ??????. "

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.