I put my finger in jars of jam/yoghurt/honey etc then lick the finger and repeat and hope nobody see's me.

Sometimes when im in my bed and trying to fall asleep, i don´t want to open my eyes in case there is a murderer standing before my bed.

watch old shows I used to watch when I was younger

I praise the honesty of you all! :) I think confessing here is kind of fun...am I alone?

get home from work and masturbate instantly

When you trip when your walking you try to play it off like you wanted to start running

Secretly think that Flo from the Progressive commercials is bangable.

when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

get really embarrassed when i leave the book i read when i poop on the bathroom counter and someone uses the bathroom.

Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

Getting the strong urge to "woo" or scream in a large and quiet crowd, such as during church.

When in class, hoping that I do not get boner right before bell rings/called up.

When you Sitting on the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

When winking, I feel as if I have to wink with the other eye to be fair to both eyes.

I always think I have special powers

Sometimes I lie in bed and wonder what the house would look like upside down.

Laying or sitting down in a really comfy position, then getting up to do something, and when you come back you can't figure out the position you just had.

I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

Thinking about what is nothing and other deep shit when trying to fall asleep.

I yawn on command… and hate it. –Ikka

Picking your nose to get rid of that annoying whistling in your nose when you breathe.

Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

While going to sleep, you turn the pillow downside-up several times to find a cooler surface.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.