I put my finger in jars of jam/yoghurt/honey etc then lick the finger and repeat and hope nobody see's me.

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Sometimes when im in my bed and trying to fall asleep, i don´t want to open my eyes in case there is a murderer standing before my bed.

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watch old shows I used to watch when I was younger

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I praise the honesty of you all! :) I think confessing here is kind of fun...am I alone?

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get home from work and masturbate instantly

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When you trip when your walking you try to play it off like you wanted to start running

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Secretly think that Flo from the Progressive commercials is bangable.

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when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

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get really embarrassed when i leave the book i read when i poop on the bathroom counter and someone uses the bathroom.

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Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

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Getting the strong urge to "woo" or scream in a large and quiet crowd, such as during church.

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When in class, hoping that I do not get boner right before bell rings/called up.

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When you Sitting on the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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When winking, I feel as if I have to wink with the other eye to be fair to both eyes.

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I always think I have special powers

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Sometimes I lie in bed and wonder what the house would look like upside down.

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Laying or sitting down in a really comfy position, then getting up to do something, and when you come back you can't figure out the position you just had.

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I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

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Thinking about what is nothing and other deep shit when trying to fall asleep.

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I yawn on command… and hate it. –Ikka

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Picking your nose to get rid of that annoying whistling in your nose when you breathe.

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Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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While going to sleep, you turn the pillow downside-up several times to find a cooler surface.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.