When in class, hoping that I do not get boner right before bell rings/called up.

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You do a retarded dance when a song you don't like comes on

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I have mixed emotions when I drop a piece of food on the ground, like a chicken nugget, M&M, scoop of ice cream, etc - because part of me thinks it is sad because its only goal in life was to be eaten... but then the other part of me is happy for it, because it is possible that it *didn't* want to be eaten and has just made a successful escape. O_o

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look around my house for something to do for what feels like an hour then look back at a clock to realize thats its only been 4 minutes

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Think someone's watching me so I do cool stuff to impress them just in case they are

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Wish that Mexicans would go ruin their own country instead of ruin ours.

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Cope with serious things by not taking them seriously.

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log off the internet then think of something and go back on

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When you Sitting on the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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Sometimes when im in my bed and trying to fall asleep, i don´t want to open my eyes in case there is a murderer standing before my bed.

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after having a hot shower I sometimes just sit in my room wearing just a towel

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watch old shows I used to watch when I was younger

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Hang something small in front of the webcam, in case someone is secretly watching me.

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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get home from work and masturbate instantly

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Erasing the history cache on the computer after visiting an x rated website.

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Watching tv with family/friends and laughing at something on the show, and then feeling awkward because no one else laughed.

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Read weird posts like this one on the HorseHead Network.

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Laying or sitting down in a really comfy position, then getting up to do something, and when you come back you can't figure out the position you just had.

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I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

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I yawn on command… and hate it. –Ikka

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whenever there's a fight on facebook, i sit back and read it and i'm just like "people are stupid hehe"

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Pubic hair wishes... While on the toilet you try to pull out a hair... If it comes out close your eyes and make a wish....and throw it into the toilet... Flush... Repeat!

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Read for hours... then hear a narrative for everything you do after you stop reading. for ex: "Jen gets out of the car, shutting it with a loud bang. She walks towards the house, noticing the dead squirrel in the road."

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.