When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

You do a retarded dance when a song you don't like comes on

When your friend tells you something, but you don't hear them so you just start laughing.

When i play a video game and make some stupid noobish action including suiciding or playing in a lame way, i make sure that if somehow someone sees my screen, he/she notices why i do so.

When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

Try to flip the dice at the casino to my number with my mind

Looking up 'How to tell if your crush likes you' to get assurance that he/she loves you

Erasing the history cache on the computer after visiting an x rated website.

sometime i poop in my hand, then put it in the toilet so it makes less noise and the water doesn't splash up my butt.

I have had a dream where my teeth fall out.

When you think you don't hear someone, but as soon as you say, "what?" and they start repeating it, you realize that you know what they had said. But then you don't want to be rude, so you let them finish.

ur parents never pay attention to u but when they do they r yelling at u

Writing d as b and b as d or p as q

write a test and the information i studied most is not on the test

I tuck all sides of the blanket under my body and feet then over my head and leave a fresh air hole so im in a cocoon of blanket.

Scared to flush the tolite at friends houses in fear that i will wake someone up of break the tolite.

Rereading a text message 25 times before you send it to make sure it makes sense.

when I get a really good idea, I write notes in excruciating detail, as I believe my brilliance will quickly disappear and I will have no idea what I was writing about ..

Read shampoo bottle when no magazine in bathroom.

Daydream about doing unspeakable things(killing, raping, beating, cutting, shooting, ect.) to the person you hate

Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

Living in the shadow of an atheletic friend, and secretly wanting to beat them up just to prove that you're as good as they are.

I always have excellent manners when eating around others, but when I'm alone I eat like a pig and have no manners.

"????????? ???? ?????! ??? ?? ???????? UH1 HUEY!!! ??? ?? ???????? ??????? ??????????? ?????, ????????? ?? ??????? ? ??????????????? ???????!!! ?????? ????, ???????????????? ?? ???????, ?? ?????? ??????? ?? ????! ???? ???????????? ???????, ????? ??????? ???? ??? ?????????, ? ??????????? ?????, ??? ????????? ??????? ??????????? ?????!!! ? ??? ?? ????? ???? ??????? ??????????? ??????????. ???????? ????????,???? ????, ??? ??????? ?????? ??? ????? ??? ????? ???? ? ??????. "

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.