Hate using public bathrooms because everyone can hear you pee.

Cross the street or go some other way to avoid the awkward moment of long lasting side by side walking (a move known as the 'overtake') when walking right behind someone who is slightly slower than you.

i don't have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

Sometimes when you are looking down at a book or something you look up because you think you saw a person. Nope it was a tall lamp with a coat hung on it. Find youself periodically looking up every 5 minutes to make sure.

Does anyone else look at people when there talking and then randomly get in on there conversation.

Hang something small in front of the webcam, in case someone is secretly watching me.

When i want to write a joke on anti jokes.com i laugh at my friends instead!

when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

draw the sun at the corner of the page

Wondering who would cry at your funeral

You come across a movie on network television, you own it, you can see the DVD on the shelf, it would take you less then 30 seconds to put the DVD on, instead you watch it on that station, commercials and all.

I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

Think of a song, tv show, or movie for a brief moment. Hear/see it the next day.

Cuss my ass off in the morning - jd

Secretly think that Flo from the Progressive commercials is bangable.

I sit in a chair upside down and pretend like i'm walking on the ceiling.

Thinking about what is nothing and other deep shit when trying to fall asleep.

wonder why the word "MORTGAGE" has a T in it?

I put my finger in jars of jam/yoghurt/honey etc then lick the finger and repeat and hope nobody see's me.

setting your alarm early so that when you wake up you see you still have time to sleep and you're like YES!!!

When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

I sometimes feel like I am the only one like me in this world

when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

Buy something and try to save it for an event of some kind and end up failing to do so, every darn time too.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.