get home from work and masturbate instantly

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Secretly think that Flo from the Progressive commercials is bangable.

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I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

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wonder why the word "MORTGAGE" has a T in it?

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When it's 12:59 or 4:59 or something:59, I don't let myself blink/breathe until it's 1:00 or 5:00 or something:00. Anyone?

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Picking your nose to get rid of that annoying whistling in your nose when you breathe.

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watch old shows I used to watch when I was younger

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I praise the honesty of you all! :) I think confessing here is kind of fun...am I alone?

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http://www.todayswhatsappstatus.com/

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Read weird posts like this one on the HorseHead Network.

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try as hard as possible to not use the last of the toilet paper so you don't have to change the roll and inadvertently force someone else to do it.

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choose which piece of cereal in the cereal bowl i should eat last.

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Seriously I am tired but, I read the fucking solvemedia stating "forget this", then I stood there for a moment having just forgot what I was supposed to type. "Was I not supposed to forget what I just read?" Nero: BRAINWASHING! FORGET THIS AND LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR MOTHER! IM LEUTANANT BANGUS YOUR MUTHERUS YOU IDIOT!

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I let everyone know I'm a lesbian as soon as I meet them, ('cause I wouldn't want to continue talking to someone who hates gays).

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When I was a little kid and something scared me (i.e. feel like being watched when I walked through the forest in the dark) I began to sing... and then I felt somehow protected. Weird, isn`t it?

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When I'm fighting with someone and I've ran out of good points, I just start making random noises.

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I can't drink while I'm walking I have to stop.

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When im in a public toilet, i try not to make any sounds when taking a crap, not even a fart, so that when i come out no one will think i was taking a crap.

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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Erasing the history cache on the computer after visiting an x rated website.

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Think someone's watching me so I do cool stuff to impress them just in case they are

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the time where you sit behind a person that smells like BO badly!!!

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Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

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Try to stop a stopwatch exactly on 1 second with no extra milliseconds

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.