Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

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After going to the bathroom, flush the toilet than hurry out of the bathroom and walk fast past a certain line going across the floor or make an imaginary line on the floor before the toilet fully flushes.

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You do a retarded dance when a song you don't like comes on

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Looking up 'How to tell if your crush likes you' to get assurance that he/she loves you

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When I'm walking on the sidewalk, I try to count and keep a steady rate of how many times I step on each slab of concrete.

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Secretly think that Flo from the Progressive commercials is bangable.

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I think about doing evil things to people then i tell the person about it nikki

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Not wanting to think about something but your brain thinks about it because you are trying not to think about it so much.

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Cope with serious things by not taking them seriously.

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When I'm trying to sleep and my mind's like, "Hey, know what's a good movie? Paranormal Activity!" Then I can't sleep for an hour - Brayden Everes

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I seriously contemplate what my theme song would be. I imagine it would have no words and a slight Mission Impossible influence.

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reading thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com at the office when you're supposed to be working then checking that the guy next to you doesn't notice. and quickly clicking a different tab when someone is walking or standing nearby.

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When drunk, I often grab something, lift it into the air, and yell "I GOT THE POWER!" just in case it turns me into He-Man.

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While going to sleep, you turn the pillow downside-up several times to find a cooler surface.

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When a song comes on that i hate on the radio, i sing along with it because i know the lyrics. (Example: something by Justtin bieber D:)

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I randomly highlight stuff when I'm reading something, only to click outside of the text so I can actually read it.

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Use head & "Shoulders" for pubic hair

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When you think you don't hear someone, but as soon as you say, "what?" and they start repeating it, you realize that you know what they had said. But then you don't want to be rude, so you let them finish.

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try as hard as possible to not use the last of the toilet paper so you don't have to change the roll and inadvertently force someone else to do it.

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Create scenarios when you are standing around/ waiting for someone in public (ie. pretending you are sending a text to someone), in fear of what people may think if they see you standing around doing nothing.

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choose which piece of cereal in the cereal bowl i should eat last.

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worry about your eyebrows sneaking their way up and making wrinkles on your forehead

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Hearing someone singing a song and stopping midway, so you need to finish it.

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Totally piss myself off by thinking of future confrontations that probably won't happen.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.