When taking a dump in a public restroom, if someone else walks in, I wait until they leave the restroom before finishing up and leaving the stall, just to make sure they don't see who I am.

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stare at someones face until they distort and then wonder why they are asking me why I'm smiling.

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You come across a movie on network television, you own it, you can see the DVD on the shelf, it would take you less then 30 seconds to put the DVD on, instead you watch it on that station, commercials and all.

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I only make the tv volume in multiples of 5.

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Convince yourself that all of your friends are partying together without you when they dont respond to your text messages.

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When bored, I often fold pieces of paper to make a little point and poke my fingers/hands with it.

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fist myself to the point of unconsciousness whilst masturbating to the speeches of Hitler

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When I'm walking on the sidewalk, I try to count and keep a steady rate of how many times I step on each slab of concrete.

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Giving my dog a massage.

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having cool friends, but all of their other friends are nerds.

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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Am i the only one who noticed that the title of this page has a grammatical error?

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Take baths

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read some comments here and wonder if people really do that

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wonder who wrote these things

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pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

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When I'm on Facebook, I don't like anything in my news feed thats older then 15 minutes or else i'll feel like they think ima creeping on them.

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Waste time looking all over for something and notice it is right where it should be.

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get really embarrassed when i leave the book i read when i poop on the bathroom counter and someone uses the bathroom.

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I never read the terms and conditions but I say I have

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Force a piss out really hard because you're in a rush.

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I talk to myself while playing games so I don't feel lonley!

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When I'm getting shouted out i blur my eyes and think of something else :3

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I eat one way in public and another way in private.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.