When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

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Put toilet paper on the seat in my own house.

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if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

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Read and laugh at about any top comment here... because it happens to me too.

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Sometimes I like to count the amount of steps it takes to get upstairs/downstairs. Then I realize that the number is never the same.

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When I'm cooking, I mumble everything I'm doing under my breath like I'm in a cooking show and I'm talking to the audience.

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coughing when your having a poo so people know that your on the loo

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Try to flip the dice at the casino to my number with my mind

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Giving my dog a massage.

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Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

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Take baths

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When watching the news and see all those children and other innocent people die at wars, in my mind I shout at God and ask him why he doesn't give me the sign and my powers to save the world. J.C.

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When I woke up this morning I was asleep.

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when walking up to an automatic door, you sweep your hand towards to the door when it opens, you feel like the Force is with you.

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I want to suck on your penis

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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Wondering how you look to other people and adjusting your clothes and posture so you don't feel as unatractive as you think you are, but aren't.

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Vote up your own websites posts, to make them look more popular!

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Whenever I Iook into the mirror, I think there's a second evil dimension.

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Go to the kitchen to eat, forget what I'm doing, go back to whatever I was doing, and realizing that I'm hungry.

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Look at the time but have to look again 3 seconds later because you forgot.

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I often think I have the greastest taste in everything

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When I am walking at night, I see a slight shadow behind me for a second, I walk faster, I see the shadow again, I think it is some kind of scary monster and then I decide to run for my life. When I get back home, I realize the shadow is my shadow.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.