Giving my dog a massage.

When I have an argument with someone and they're correcting my grammar over a word that I obviously made up but they're grammar/slash spelling skills suck I want to end them.

When I'm walking on the sidewalk, I try to count and keep a steady rate of how many times I step on each slab of concrete.

I like eating chicken clubs with my hands and dip them in ketchup while pretending I am a caveman

getting self conscious when wearing a hoodie because you start pitting out and you can start to smell BO...

Turn the fan and/or sink on in the bathroom to drown out the noise from masturbating.

Use head & "Shoulders" for pubic hair

when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

Read and laugh at about any top comment here... because it happens to me too.

I wonder sometimes if I've ever met my future self.

Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftcodes.info <

Sometimes, after I say "bye" to a person on facebook, I wait a few seconds before I log off so that it seems like I said "bye" to other people too. Because I'm just that popular.

go though and like the posts with only one like so the person who wrote it doesn't feel alone.

Vote up your own websites posts, to make them look more popular!

reading thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com at the office when you're supposed to be working then checking that the guy next to you doesn't notice. and quickly clicking a different tab when someone is walking or standing nearby.

Try to flip the dice at the casino to my number with my mind

Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

whenever i'm talking about someone, i constantly check my phone to make sure i haven't butt-dialed them and they're listening to everything i'm saying about them!

"????????? ???? ?????! ??? ?? ???????? UH1 HUEY!!! ??? ?? ???????? ??????? ??????????? ?????, ????????? ?? ??????? ? ??????????????? ???????!!! ?????? ????, ???????????????? ?? ???????, ?? ?????? ??????? ?? ????! ???? ???????????? ???????, ????? ??????? ???? ??? ?????????, ? ??????????? ?????, ??? ????????? ??????? ??????????? ?????!!! ? ??? ?? ????? ???? ??????? ??????????? ??????????. ???????? ????????,???? ????, ??? ??????? ?????? ??? ????? ??? ????? ???? ? ??????. "

When ever my boyfriend doesn't reply to a text for a few hours I always imagine a worse case scenario and end up crying hystaricaly.

In britain,everytime i see a magpie i got to do this silly ritual and salute and say good morning mr magpie (depending on wat time of day it is) and make sure 2 ppl see it at the same time or something bad will happen.then someone will tell me another one i should do and i add it on! Its never ending.

I eat one way in public and another way in private.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.