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masturbate quietly in my room.

In britain,everytime i see a magpie i got to do this silly ritual and salute and say good morning mr magpie (depending on wat time of day it is) and make sure 2 ppl see it at the same time or something bad will happen.then someone will tell me another one i should do and i add it on! Its never ending.

I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

put an excessive amount of lead in your pencil

Pick out an object ahead of me on the footpath and guess which foot will step closest to it

If I turn in a circle I have to turn the other way to balance it out and feel even!

Start to do homework online, end up on facebook :/

Put ear buds in nose, open mouth, instant speaker. If you don't do it try it.

after switching lights..i go run as hard as i could do after reaching the bed

I am convinced that nobody had opened bacon or packets of ham with the flappy corner because it dosnt work!! So i get a knife and saw it out.

when you get a runny nose suddenly checks for blood oh good its clear

I always have excellent manners when eating around others, but when I'm alone I eat like a pig and have no manners.

Look to the right, and see nothing. Look to the left, and see nothing. Look to the right again, and see the chick from the ring (or some scary shit) standing there.

pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

if someone posts something disgusting but true on this same site, rethink pressing the "thumbs up" button out of embaressment.

Trying to recreate all facial expressions of people on television, even animated ones!

toilet:a place for reading and going on fb shower:place for singing school:place for sleeping and fuck others.internet:place for shitting brixs.

when my mum buys way too much of something I imagine were one of those 'doomsday preppers' families, with mounds of supplies in our basement.

I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?

When im in a room alone on the computer i like to put on songs and lip sync to them in the mirror with really emotional expressions..

There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

"????????? ???? ?????! ??? ?? ???????? UH1 HUEY!!! ??? ?? ???????? ??????? ??????????? ?????, ????????? ?? ??????? ? ??????????????? ???????!!! ?????? ????, ???????????????? ?? ???????, ?? ?????? ??????? ?? ????! ???? ???????????? ???????, ????? ??????? ???? ??? ?????????, ? ??????????? ?????, ??? ????????? ??????? ??????????? ?????!!! ? ??? ?? ????? ???? ??????? ??????????? ??????????. ???????? ????????,???? ????, ??? ??????? ?????? ??? ????? ??? ????? ???? ? ??????. "

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.