I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

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when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

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When drunk, I often grab something, lift it into the air, and yell "I GOT THE POWER!" just in case it turns me into He-Man.

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For some reason I really love to be hated on horsehead network, no idea why, stopped questioning it moments ago... Moral: Know what I mean?

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when playing games like grand theft auto I drive normally like all the other people in the game when i'm bored

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Cope with serious things by not taking them seriously.

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masturbate quietly in my room.

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I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

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Buy something and try to save it for an event of some kind and end up failing to do so, every darn time too.

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When does eating pop corn, take apart the bag and lick all the extra butter.

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Wipe drink can with shirt after someone (mainly father) has had a sip.

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Create scenarios when you are standing around/ waiting for someone in public (ie. pretending you are sending a text to someone), in fear of what people may think if they see you standing around doing nothing.

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Try to make a sound described in a book or text (like a gasp or a gargle)

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When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

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Give vocal commentary on the song I just played when I'm the only one in the car.

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Avoid as many television commercials as I can

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I refuse to forward chain letters

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Constantly look at all clocks when the minute hand/digit reads '11'

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getting self conscious when wearing a hoodie because you start pitting out and you can start to smell BO...

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When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Cover the built in webcam on my laptop when I'm using it with a folded piece of paper just in case

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In britain,everytime i see a magpie i got to do this silly ritual and salute and say good morning mr magpie (depending on wat time of day it is) and make sure 2 ppl see it at the same time or something bad will happen.then someone will tell me another one i should do and i add it on! Its never ending.

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I eat one way in public and another way in private.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.