Show up for a blind date and say DAMN, WTF! When they open the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -116

Your mom. Just kidding everyone does her.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Wipe drink can with shirt after someone (mainly father) has had a sip.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I hate it whenever i hear Manny Paquiao saying "you know" in every interviews he make. Am i the only one who notice it?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Thinking you smell really bad and then putting to much deodorant/perfume/ect and you still think you smell bad. Is this just me?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Meet a really cool girl imagine the rest of my life with her.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Go up/down the stairs in 10 steps exactly. Talk to an imaginary girlfriend when I'm guilty of something, and she helps me out and holds me till I fall asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Look at the clock to realize that it seems like the "second" hand is taking longer on the number its on right when you look at it, and/or you looked at the clock at the absolute perfect time. And it happens frequently..

thumb_up thumb_down -115

I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

thumb_up thumb_down -117

While in the shower, after ive used soap and stuff i turn the water to cold and i pretend im on fear factor and close my eyes so i cannot see what i am trying to get while crawling through freezing cold water

thumb_up thumb_down +8

See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

thumb_up thumb_down

Make the water from your shower shoot from your finger and pretend to be a water-bender.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

going to bed at 10:30 pm realize i have to check Facebook go to YouTube randomly watch 2 hours of nothing, then find my self pulling an all nighter cause its 4 am and i got school.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I apologize, when i bump against things.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I hate other people's mirrors, they make me look different

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Think of something really hilarious to put on the internet, read the rest of a post, and then forget what you were going to write.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Thinking of something but got distracted for a few seconds. After that, I forgot what was I thinking about.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Blast yur music in the car when you are alone but when someone pulls up next to you u turn it down so u don't make them think yur an ass

thumb_up thumb_down -78

Everytime I look at the clock it see so say 4 20 9 11 or 11 11

thumb_up thumb_down -92

In britain,everytime i see a magpie i got to do this silly ritual and salute and say good morning mr magpie (depending on wat time of day it is) and make sure 2 ppl see it at the same time or something bad will happen.then someone will tell me another one i should do and i add it on! Its never ending.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

Trying to recreate all facial expressions of people on television, even animated ones!

thumb_up thumb_down -114

When i was a kid. I really dont care about the story of any animated film. As long as im watching it.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.