Putting your bra on your dogs dead

thumb_up thumb_down +9

When I see that someone else is typing while I'm texting them, I try to quickly finish what I'm typing and send it so that I won't have to change my response.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I feel like my blanket is an indestructible shield against any monsters that might try to get me at night. If any part of you is out of the covers, you're screwed. lol -ML

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Domina Olga shows no mercy when she ride your dick

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Not get any thumb ups on a post. Turns out there really are some things only I do...

thumb_up thumb_down -21

when dialing a number, i hear the number itself when it is dialed

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I sometimes want to eat spaghetti with my hands, but for whatever reason have never done it...

thumb_up thumb_down -21

When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Fap and when you're done you feel ashamed and feel like you're wasting your life lol

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

When I check into a hotel room I think about the countless number of sex acts that has been performed in there.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Feel all cool and look suspiciously at everybody else while leaving the theater after a good dramatic movie.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

whenever i'm talking about someone, i constantly check my phone to make sure i haven't butt-dialed them and they're listening to everything i'm saying about them!

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Clench your butt super hard to slowly let out a fart thinking no one will know.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

wonder y nobody facebook likes or comments on these

thumb_up thumb_down -57

pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Waste time looking all over for something and notice it is right where it should be.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

dont wash hands for the recommended 30 seconds

thumb_up thumb_down -95

I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

thumb_up thumb_down -107

When you fart in class but try to cover it up by moving around so other people think it was just the chair squeaking.

thumb_up thumb_down -119

get caught up in youtube comment arguments

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Start thinking about how your walking, and then worry that you may lose control of your legs and fall.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

One time I went to my old primary school and while I was there I needed the toilet. So I go use the schools and was shocked at how small everything was I guess because I haven't been there in a while

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.