I replace every word of a song with the name of my pet

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I hate it whenever i hear Manny Paquiao saying "you know" in every interviews he make. Am i the only one who notice it?

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I always have excellent manners when eating around others, but when I'm alone I eat like a pig and have no manners.

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Stepping on people's feet when I approach to kiss/hug/say hi to them.

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Food is always tastier the SECOND time you heat it up.

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I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

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Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

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Giving my dog a massage.

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I have seen a UFO

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when i talk to someone, and the one where i am talking with is saying a sentence very fast, am going to repeat the whole sentence in my head and then it sounds really weird.

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Take baths

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.don't like something because being scared that it appears on my wall.

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Before i go to sleep, i imagine all the things i would like to happen in the future, and hoping it comes true or ill dream of it

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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I want to suck on your penis

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if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

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I aphabeticalize my shoes

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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I like to burn candles in my room and some times I burn the hair on my arm and smell it afterwards

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Read and laugh at about any top comment here... because it happens to me too.

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Feel like you're the only one pressured into giving gum away by your friends.

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coughing when your having a poo so people know that your on the loo

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Whenever I Iook into the mirror, I think there's a second evil dimension.

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I sit in my sink and pretend that I am water.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.