after a shower, try to shake the water off.

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I can't stop watching ST:DS9, (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine) It's so awesome, but then I just, (the same thing happens with whatever T.V. show i watch) GET COMPLETELY OBSESSED with it.

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stare at the same gender for a long time and think 2 urself "am i gay?" and when they look at you, you tun ur eyes another way!

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I like to food shop between midnight and 5 am

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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I sometimes want to eat spaghetti with my hands, but for whatever reason have never done it...

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Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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i would air drum even if theres no music playing

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Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

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Feel all cool and look suspiciously at everybody else while leaving the theater after a good dramatic movie.

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Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

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I brush my teeth in the shower and use the shower for a waterpik.

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When you're having a discussion or an argument with someone and you are about to say something important then you completely forget what you were going to say.

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Am i the only one who noticed that the title of this page has a grammatical error?

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See a news article that looks interesting, too lazy to read the whole thing. Skim.

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When something weird happens I nod in agreement.

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Waste time looking all over for something and notice it is right where it should be.

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

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The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

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Try to make a sound described in a book or text (like a gasp or a gargle)

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Domina Olga shows no mercy when she ride your dick

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Awkward moment... Pretend to send a text.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.