Get a mini heart attack when your rocking on your chair and you nearly fall off

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Go to the kitchen to eat, forget what I'm doing, go back to whatever I was doing, and realizing that I'm hungry.

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Massive hang-over. Say out loud and promise I will never drink like that again. Next time drink atleast as much as the last time.

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Constantly looking up at a Facebook tab while on another tab to see if you have any notifications or messages.

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Sometimes when I'm sitting next to a random person having a conversation with them (in the car for instance) I imagine myself reaching out and holding their hand. I then get super embarrassed just for having the thought.

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For some reason I really love to be hated on horsehead network, no idea why, stopped questioning it moments ago... Moral: Know what I mean?

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When watching the news and see all those children and other innocent people die at wars, in my mind I shout at God and ask him why he doesn't give me the sign and my powers to save the world. J.C.

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Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

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pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

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if someone posts something disgusting but true on this same site, rethink pressing the "thumbs up" button out of embaressment.

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I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

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Sometimes I stop typing in the middle of a sen

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put an excessive amount of lead in your pencil

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Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

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having cool friends, but all of their other friends are nerds.

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Vote for the other guy

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Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.

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Ladies ; wear the thin underwear with the really skinny jeans & pants , & save the thick underwear for the baggy jeans & sweatpants ..

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I like to food shop between midnight and 5 am

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wonder if anyone is on at 12 A.M. log on to a social network and realize that theres a lot of people on

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Daydream about doing unspeakable things(killing, raping, beating, cutting, shooting, ect.) to the person you hate

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Never write LOL on a text message, because you don't want to sound too extreme

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I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

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Wipe drink can with shirt after someone (mainly father) has had a sip.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.