The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

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When I see that someone else is typing while I'm texting them, I try to quickly finish what I'm typing and send it so that I won't have to change my response.

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Imagine the perfect video game and wonder why nobody made it yet.

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I use two pillows as I sleep, but I don't put them under my head, I put my head in between them.

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I peel tiny strings off of cheese sticks because it's more fun and tastes better.

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Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

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In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

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having cool friends, but all of their other friends are nerds.

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Fap and when you're done you feel ashamed and feel like you're wasting your life lol

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When I check into a hotel room I think about the countless number of sex acts that has been performed in there.

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Thinking of something but got distracted for a few seconds. After that, I forgot what was I thinking about.

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When you're having a discussion or an argument with someone and you are about to say something important then you completely forget what you were going to say.

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Realise logically that a chicken egg is her period. we eat chicken periods!

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I only used to eat McCoys Salt & Vinegar crisps when it was raining, because I thought they tasted better when it rains. Anyone else?

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WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

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At restaurants, eat my food in sections. Usually leafy greens, french fries, then steak/ whatever meat.

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Never write LOL on a text message, because you don't want to sound too extreme

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I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

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Not get any thumb ups on a post. Turns out there really are some things only I do...

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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I like to swallow great ammounts of water just to make the loud "clunk" sound in my throat.

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Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

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Purposely scuff a shoe on pavement after the other scuffs by accident. Feel you scuffed this foot a little too much and so re-scuff the first to balance things out.

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whenever i'm talking about someone, i constantly check my phone to make sure i haven't butt-dialed them and they're listening to everything i'm saying about them!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.