I make different scenarios for different songs I listen to. I pretend the walls and couches are people. I talk to them.

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While in the shower, after ive used soap and stuff i turn the water to cold and i pretend im on fear factor and close my eyes so i cannot see what i am trying to get while crawling through freezing cold water

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i always fall in my imaginations. whenever i think of something, e.g me walking to my room, i'd fall on my way there. what's wrong with me.....

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When I'm in the shower I condition my pubes so they get nice and soft.

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I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

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When i'm home alone with the dog i have a conversation with the dog, sometimes in my head & sometimes out loud, in the voice that i think the dog would have if it could speak. Then sometimes i realise that i haven't checked if anybody else is home !

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I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

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I often force my mind to think that i'm slowing down time at will just to feel awesome (like when walking down the street i try to make the all cars slow down).

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Thinking you smell really bad and then putting to much deodorant/perfume/ect and you still think you smell bad. Is this just me?

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Food is always tastier the SECOND time you heat it up.

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Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

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I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

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Look to the right, and see nothing. Look to the left, and see nothing. Look to the right again, and see the chick from the ring (or some scary shit) standing there.

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fist myself to the point of unconsciousness whilst masturbating to the speeches of Hitler

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When you drop something and then drop it again as soon as you start picking it up

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"????????? ???? ?????! ??? ?? ???????? UH1 HUEY!!! ??? ?? ???????? ??????? ??????????? ?????, ????????? ?? ??????? ? ??????????????? ???????!!! ?????? ????, ???????????????? ?? ???????, ?? ?????? ??????? ?? ????! ???? ???????????? ???????, ????? ??????? ???? ??? ?????????, ? ??????????? ?????, ??? ????????? ??????? ??????????? ?????!!! ? ??? ?? ????? ???? ??????? ??????????? ??????????. ???????? ????????,???? ????, ??? ??????? ?????? ??? ????? ??? ????? ???? ? ??????. "

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Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

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pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

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laziness .... its all in the mind

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While making yourself something to eat that takes more than 5 minuets to make. Pretending that you have your own show on a cooking station and talk like your talking to the audience the whole time.

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I want to suck on your penis

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I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.