Never write LOL on a text message, because you don't want to sound too extreme

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stare at someones face until they distort and then wonder why they are asking me why I'm smiling.

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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Not get any thumb ups on a post. Turns out there really are some things only I do...

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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when my mum buys way too much of something I imagine were one of those 'doomsday preppers' families, with mounds of supplies in our basement.

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Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

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Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

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When I'm riding in the car, I'll spot a tree, make it my goal and try to beat the car on the opposite side of the road to it. (Seriously I don't think anyone else does this!)

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Am i the only one who noticed that the title of this page has a grammatical error?

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whenever I lucid dream, I find that I don't do much

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pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

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Waste time looking all over for something and notice it is right where it should be.

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Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

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when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

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when i was i kid i use to do the balloon trick where you rubit on your head then when there is enough put it on a wooden floor and while it's followin me i put my hands out and pretended that i was controlling it

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See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

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I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

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Domina Olga shows no mercy when she ride your dick

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Do an epic air drum solo while listening to Phil Colins "In The Air Tonight"

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going to bed at 10:30 pm realize i have to check Facebook go to YouTube randomly watch 2 hours of nothing, then find my self pulling an all nighter cause its 4 am and i got school.

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You come across a movie on network television, you own it, you can see the DVD on the shelf, it would take you less then 30 seconds to put the DVD on, instead you watch it on that station, commercials and all.

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Think of a song, tv show, or movie for a brief moment. Hear/see it the next day.

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When I am surfing the web and i go to another website i see an ad that was about something i just viewed from previous website I wonder if a little man is inside my pc keeping catalog of every website that i visit.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.