Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

thumb_up thumb_down -82

when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

thumb_up thumb_down -86

In a meeting at work, you imagine throwing coffee into your boss's face, just to see what he would do.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

thumb_up thumb_down -110

Feeling guilty for something you haven't done.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Go to someone's house and go and ask where something is and the person you ask just tells you without getting up (I know it doesn't go with the theme of this site but its just something annoying)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I sometimes feel someone is watching me and speak towards it in a calming tone, only to again speak to myself telling myself im just being silly... only to turn my head and look behind me just in case.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Walk next to someone so you don't look too lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Admit, that most of your saved files on you´re computer have titles like: sdfdshleh / sjjs87 / sjflekeh

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Wish I could hang out with some people from this site sometimes.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

When on a long car ride, i tend to look out the window and imagine that i am running on the side of the car and doing flips and other types of parkour to keep up with my car...

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I hate people who shows-off their SLR Cameras. I mean, so you're a human now because of that?

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Lying in be and pretending you are in a tv show, the characters best friend, playing it out in your mind. Or you dream while awake, and you control it, and you fly to Hollywood and become your faborite celebrities best friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I always paranoidly think that someone else might see what I see through my eyes he can't hear what I hear and he can't smell what I smell he can only see and if I close my eyes he falls asleep automatically I try to avoid thinking this but that's impossible

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I want to trade bodies and thought processes with my crush, so we could understand each other better.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

when making thing only you think you do you never read the terms of service

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

read some posts and then sit with friends and try to come up with some good things for this website

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Get the feeling that somebody is going to grab your foot when you walk by a bed in the dark...

thumb_up thumb_down -43

When something says "I have read and agree to the terms of service" I quickly skim through it nd act like I read it.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Look at pictures of people who lived a long time ago and wonder how they lived without television and the Internet.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

pull out a flies wings and let it go

thumb_up thumb_down -55

I eat ass

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.