Turns the bathroom sink water on so no one hears you pee nikki

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I think of unbelievably perverted things seconds before I am about to cum when masturbating.

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Thinking of something but got distracted for a few seconds. After that, I forgot what was I thinking about.

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When you're having a discussion or an argument with someone and you are about to say something important then you completely forget what you were going to say.

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Think of something really hilarious to put on the internet, read the rest of a post, and then forget what you were going to write.

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when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

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pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

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when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

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Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

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At restaurants, eat my food in sections. Usually leafy greens, french fries, then steak/ whatever meat.

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I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

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When you fart in class but try to cover it up by moving around so other people think it was just the chair squeaking.

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If I'm walking across a road and a car stops to allow me to pass, I say 'Thank you' even though I know full well they cannot hear me.

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Burp, and then automatically say burp afterwards.

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See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

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Thinking about different guys and how they would be in bed, then thinking im a slut for thinking it...

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I use two pillows as I sleep, but I don't put them under my head, I put my head in between them.

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Look at a guy and think that he is a good looking guy, than immidiatly try to think of something else because thats gay.

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Wish I could hang out with some people from this site sometimes.

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When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

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think that the whole world is a dollhouse and we are being controlled by giant people above who live in a whole differnt world

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I combine every item on my plate in all the possible ways, then i eat the worst part of the meal and save the best part til last.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.