Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

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I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

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Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

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I like to food shop between midnight and 5 am

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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get annoyed when people talk on the phone really loudly in front of the TV, forcing you to mute your show, resulting in you missing half of what the people are saying.

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push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

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Check behind the shower curtain for a killer.

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If I'm walking across a road and a car stops to allow me to pass, I say 'Thank you' even though I know full well they cannot hear me.

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The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

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wait up to 14 days just to find the opportunity to use one, really good, joke.

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When playing Sims, i spend more time building my house, than playing the game itself.

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Pee in the shower

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When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

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I peel tiny strings off of cheese sticks because it's more fun and tastes better.

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When I'm in the shower I condition my pubes so they get nice and soft.

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Drink a huge amount of water only for the pleasure of having your stomach filled with it.

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Feeling like no one really "knows" me, but only what they already see/know. Most things about me my family don't know about.

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Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.

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Naming every pet you've ever owned Peter Jankins

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I want to trade bodies and thought processes with my crush, so we could understand each other better.

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when making thing only you think you do you never read the terms of service

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Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

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When I'm reading a book and I come to a word that is long or difficult to pronounce every time I come to that word again I pronounce it 'manamanam'.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.