when I have an itch on my hand I scratch it with my stubble

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Think of something really hilarious to put on the internet, read the rest of a post, and then forget what you were going to write.

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Listen to the same songs for years on end without ever knowing the lyrics because they've been the soundtracks for your daydreams.

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When boarding the escalator, I select a specific step before getting on causing a slight queue.

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If I'm walking across a road and a car stops to allow me to pass, I say 'Thank you' even though I know full well they cannot hear me.

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See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

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I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

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When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

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You come across a movie on network television, you own it, you can see the DVD on the shelf, it would take you less then 30 seconds to put the DVD on, instead you watch it on that station, commercials and all.

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Not get any thumb ups on a post. Turns out there really are some things only I do...

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Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

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think that the whole world is a dollhouse and we are being controlled by giant people above who live in a whole differnt world

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Whenever I'm holding two round objects, I try to juggle them.

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Feeling like no one really "knows" me, but only what they already see/know. Most things about me my family don't know about.

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Think about the things you could do with you had the power to stop the time.

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In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

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When I'm riding in the car, I'll spot a tree, make it my goal and try to beat the car on the opposite side of the road to it. (Seriously I don't think anyone else does this!)

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i feel relived after i prick and see that hard-white thinggy that oozes outside my annoying acne.

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When on long car rides through the mountains of Cali, look at a fence and pretend its a roller coaster and talk like im on it with a friend. And when the fence ends,name and rate it like it was real -Nirp

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Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

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When I'm bored in school I always imagine the teacher asks me something and my response is starting to sing a song. Somewhen some of my friends sing along with me. Then the whole class sings this song. We run out of classroom into the hallways and every other pupil comes out their classroom to see what's happening. Then They all sing along with me. We run out of school and sing and dance like in a musical. Then I actually remind myself, its impossible that every student knows the lyrics of the song I'm just thinking of and get depressed again.

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When I'm home alone at night, and the lights are on so you can't see anything out the windows, I will stop randomly and stare out the window to make anyone watching me think I know that they are there.

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When i see people even strangers , in my mind i wonder if there virgins or not .

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WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.