when you dont know what someone said so you just awkwardly start laughing and it turns out not to be funny.

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when dialing a number, i hear the number itself when it is dialed

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stare at someones face until they distort and then wonder why they are asking me why I'm smiling.

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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Thinking about what other poeple are doing right now... Like someone solving world hunger and your sitting there playing games and having fun with friends that are nice and healthy.

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Randomly agree for the Terms of Service for just about everything on the internet. Then becoming very frightened at the thought that you have violated them in some way.

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When riding in a car I pump my arms to pretend I'm running at an incredible rate.

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I brush my teeth in the shower and use the shower for a waterpik.

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Am i the only one who noticed that the title of this page has a grammatical error?

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Look at pictures of people who lived a long time ago and wonder how they lived without television and the Internet.

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When you're the youngest child, you never quit feeling like a little kids, even in your 20s.

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Before posting a comment when you need several consecutive tries to type the words in the box because the lettering is so damn hard to read. But your friend can do it in one try. He got the easy one.

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I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

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I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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im going to kill that person and get away with it

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I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

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When boarding the escalator, I select a specific step before getting on causing a slight queue.

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While in the shower, after ive used soap and stuff i turn the water to cold and i pretend im on fear factor and close my eyes so i cannot see what i am trying to get while crawling through freezing cold water

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See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

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When something you're sat on makes a noise that sounds like a FART. So you try and do the noise again, to make sure people are aware that the noise was the chair and not you!

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I often force my mind to think that i'm slowing down time at will just to feel awesome (like when walking down the street i try to make the all cars slow down).

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Sometimes I stop typing in the middle of a sen

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.