wish you looked like either Kellan Lutz or Bradley Cooper! I wish magic existed now.

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I apologize, when i bump against things.

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Thinking of something but got distracted for a few seconds. After that, I forgot what was I thinking about.

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When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

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Getting really ticked off when Wikipedia tells you the ending of a book in the introduction. And the thing is that you don't even see it coming! Ex. My Sister's Keeper is about a family struggling with its own internal problems, especially with the oldest daughter having leukemia and the youngest is the only one who may or may not save her. *name* dies in the end. WTF?

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When something says "I have read and agree to the terms of service" I quickly skim through it nd act like I read it.

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Whenever I send or receive texts, I always make it a point to have more received texts than sent ones. It makes me feel popular.

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Listen to the same songs for years on end without ever knowing the lyrics because they've been the soundtracks for your daydreams.

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Meet a really cool girl imagine the rest of my life with her.

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Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

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When you're the youngest child, you never quit feeling like a little kids, even in your 20s.

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When I'm bored in school I always imagine the teacher asks me something and my response is starting to sing a song. Somewhen some of my friends sing along with me. Then the whole class sings this song. We run out of classroom into the hallways and every other pupil comes out their classroom to see what's happening. Then They all sing along with me. We run out of school and sing and dance like in a musical. Then I actually remind myself, its impossible that every student knows the lyrics of the song I'm just thinking of and get depressed again.

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Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

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When walking on stairs, always counting how many of them there are.

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Only I CAN TYPE FUCKlNG FUCKlNG FUCKlNG AS MANY FUCKlNG TIMES I FUCKlNG WANT! Moral the friendly r*pist: FUCKlNG COOL!

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Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

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While making yourself something to eat that takes more than 5 minuets to make. Pretending that you have your own show on a cooking station and talk like your talking to the audience the whole time.

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When I need to poop in a public toilet, I poop to the side so there's no plop.

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Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

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I never read the terms and conditions but I say I have

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At restaurants, eat my food in sections. Usually leafy greens, french fries, then steak/ whatever meat.

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get annoyed when people talk on the phone really loudly in front of the TV, forcing you to mute your show, resulting in you missing half of what the people are saying.

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Burp, and then automatically say burp afterwards.

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sometimes i wonder how it would be to think in another language and i try but cant

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.