I am sure that no one else has the same mental slowness as me and my brother. When I say mauve he says maeve and we continue like this for hours. It is certainly an exciting way of eating up those motorway miles:)

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I love the feeling of covering my entire body in Barbisol shaving cream,shaving my cock n balls,then masturbating.have you ever done this?

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In public,try to make eye contact with most people.

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laziness .... its all in the mind

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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Check behind the shower curtain for a killer.

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Worry that I'm will go schizophrenic.

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Getting bored when a page is loading and scrolling the wheel on your mouse back and forth one click.

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when i'm at the computer i say out of loud what i'm typing

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Never write LOL on a text message, because you don't want to sound too extreme

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I have short haircuts so I don't have messed up hair in the morning (It's a real time saver)

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I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

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when dialing a number, i hear the number itself when it is dialed

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When I use deodorant, I flap my arms like a chicken a couple of times to get some air moving under there...

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Avoid as many television commercials as I can

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Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

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Thinking you smell really bad and then putting to much deodorant/perfume/ect and you still think you smell bad. Is this just me?

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I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

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I refuse to forward chain letters

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I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

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In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

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misread dig bick

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When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

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Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.