Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

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Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

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Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

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Waste time looking all over for something and notice it is right where it should be.

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In a meeting at work, you imagine throwing coffee into your boss's face, just to see what he would do.

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Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.

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When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

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when i'm at the computer i say out of loud what i'm typing

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When playing Sims, i spend more time building my house, than playing the game itself.

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Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

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draw pictures on the mirror from the shower steam

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When on a sidewalk I always try to make my last step on the block with my left foot.

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When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

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Make the water from your shower shoot from your finger and pretend to be a water-bender.

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I fantasize about my idol as I try to fall sleep at night. He's Michael Jackson.

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when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

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Naming every pet you've ever owned Peter Jankins

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Stop at traffic lights thinking it will close soon, when actually remains only 5s to close second and u run like crazy.

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I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

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I refuse to forward chain letters

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I always paranoidly think that someone else might see what I see through my eyes he can't hear what I hear and he can't smell what I smell he can only see and if I close my eyes he falls asleep automatically I try to avoid thinking this but that's impossible

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Here's a fun game I play if I wake up in the middle of the night: I look over at the alarm clock and see what numbers are displayed. Then I shut my eyes tightly and wait a few seconds before opening them again. If I open my eyes and see that the numbers on the alarm clock have changed, I win. If I open my eyes and they didn't, I lose.

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being super bored at shool

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I eat ass

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.