I always paranoidly think that someone else might see what I see through my eyes he can't hear what I hear and he can't smell what I smell he can only see and if I close my eyes he falls asleep automatically I try to avoid thinking this but that's impossible

Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

when home alone, I sing a song like im performing it in front of a crowd of a thousand people and any object nearby usually becomes my microphone

Here's a fun game I play if I wake up in the middle of the night: I look over at the alarm clock and see what numbers are displayed. Then I shut my eyes tightly and wait a few seconds before opening them again. If I open my eyes and see that the numbers on the alarm clock have changed, I win. If I open my eyes and they didn't, I lose.

Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

Eat my shed skin from a sunburn

When you're having a discussion or an argument with someone and you are about to say something important then you completely forget what you were going to say.

Get really annoyed when something interrupts your yawn... then try and force yourself to complete the yawn

Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

Sometimes when walking, accidently fart and then try to squeak my to sound like my shoes squeaked instead of me farting.

Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

Sometimes when I'm all alone, I like to rub vasceline on myself and pretend I'm a slug.

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Waste time looking all over for something and notice it is right where it should be.

When I'm watching something or playing something and the character goes underwater, I hold my breath until the character reaches the surface. This is weird as hell, does anyone else do this?

Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

when i was i kid i use to do the balloon trick where you rubit on your head then when there is enough put it on a wooden floor and while it's followin me i put my hands out and pretended that i was controlling it

turn the colour down on your tv and pretend what you are watching is an old movie

Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

I pick at my cuticles when I'm bored.

Everytime i take of my sweater i start singing "its getting hot in here"

I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.