Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

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When I need to poop in a public toilet, I poop to the side so there's no plop.

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when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

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When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

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Trying to recreate all facial expressions of people on television, even animated ones!

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I can't help but wonder why people write things on web sites and don't bother checking their spelling. Now they look like an idiot no matter how funny or interesting it might have been.

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get annoyed when people talk on the phone really loudly in front of the TV, forcing you to mute your show, resulting in you missing half of what the people are saying.

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creating your own personal perfect partner in romance or frendship, almost like a imaginary friend (but you don't speak to them out loud)

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See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

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Feeling guilty for something you haven't done.

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Stand really close to the mirror and look myself in the eyes. Try to scare myself or make a really fast movement, hoping my reflection can't keep up.

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sometimes i wonder how it would be to think in another language and i try but cant

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Stick my hand all the way to the bottom of a tub of grease.

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Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

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Walk next to someone so you don't look too lonely.

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I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

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Wipe drink can with shirt after someone (mainly father) has had a sip.

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Everytime i take of my sweater i start singing "its getting hot in here"

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Wish I could hang out with some people from this site sometimes.

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When on a long car ride, i tend to look out the window and imagine that i am running on the side of the car and doing flips and other types of parkour to keep up with my car...

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when you dont know what someone said so you just awkwardly start laughing and it turns out not to be funny.

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I never find things funny unless I'm in a completely silent room, and it is then that I think or see something funny and begin to almost cry of laughter.

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When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

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Wherever I drink something, I count how many times I swallow it, and I feel weird if it's not a multiple of 5. I will get more of the drink and drink it, even if I'm not thirsty, just to make my life seem a little more complete...PLEASE tell me I'm not the only one?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.