Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

When walking on stairs, always counting how many of them there are.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

thumb_up thumb_down -88

if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

thumb_up thumb_down -102

Talk to my cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I always think I have special powers

thumb_up thumb_down -3

When listening to music on computer make sure your singing the words and act cool just incase the singer of that song and some other people you admire are watching you threw your webcam.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Vote up your own websites posts, to make them look more popular!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

wonder if the strange thing you're doing right now will pop up on this website

thumb_up thumb_down -23

sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I have to put the radio volume in multiples of three and my daughter has to put it in multiples of five so when we are together it either has to be on 15 or 30.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

When I am about to thumb up a comment here that has not happened to me, I first stop myself thinking "but that has not happened to me" then I remember I thumb up comments just because I like them and proceed to do so most of the times

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Think about what to say to the person you like and never actually say it .

thumb_up thumb_down -35

After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Remember some homework I have to do... On the day that it's due.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

fist myself to the point of unconsciousness whilst masturbating to the speeches of Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down -43

When someone is reading something I have to read it at sonic speed in my head before they get to the end and if i dont do it in time I get angry.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Look to the right, and see nothing. Look to the left, and see nothing. Look to the right again, and see the chick from the ring (or some scary shit) standing there.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.