when i was i kid i use to do the balloon trick where you rubit on your head then when there is enough put it on a wooden floor and while it's followin me i put my hands out and pretended that i was controlling it

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Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

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I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

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See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

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When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

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Sometimes I walk around my house with my eyes closed and pretend I'm blind.

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When something you're sat on makes a noise that sounds like a FART. So you try and do the noise again, to make sure people are aware that the noise was the chair and not you!

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Everytime i take of my sweater i start singing "its getting hot in here"

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Wish I could hang out with some people from this site sometimes.

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I cannot f***ing believe how many of these i do... and now i feel out of place

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Look at a guy and think that he is a good looking guy, than immidiatly try to think of something else because thats gay.

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While waiting for my food ot cook, I'll wash the dirty dishes that I used so that I don't need to wash lots of dishes after I eat.

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When I am about to thumb up a comment here that has not happened to me, I first stop myself thinking "but that has not happened to me" then I remember I thumb up comments just because I like them and proceed to do so most of the times

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Take everything out of the fridge, and climb in it, and pretend your in a time capsule.

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Think about the things you could do with you had the power to stop the time.

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when home alone, I sing a song like im performing it in front of a crowd of a thousand people and any object nearby usually becomes my microphone

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I apologize, when i bump against things.

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When on long car rides through the mountains of Cali, look at a fence and pretend its a roller coaster and talk like im on it with a friend. And when the fence ends,name and rate it like it was real -Nirp

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repeat what you just said 2 seconds ago in a group conversation thinking no one heard you

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Am i the only one who noticed that the title of this page has a grammatical error?

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I eat ass

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I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

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I sometimes try to summon things with the force of my thoughts...I would be so useful...but no way, nothing ever moves.

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Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.