Go to someone's house and go and ask where something is and the person you ask just tells you without getting up (I know it doesn't go with the theme of this site but its just something annoying)

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sometimes i wonder how it would be to think in another language and i try but cant

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sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.

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wonder if the strange thing you're doing right now will pop up on this website

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I have to put the radio volume in multiples of three and my daughter has to put it in multiples of five so when we are together it either has to be on 15 or 30.

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Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

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Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

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when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

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Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

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Think about what to say to the person you like and never actually say it .

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Remember some homework I have to do... On the day that it's due.

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Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

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Look to the right, and see nothing. Look to the left, and see nothing. Look to the right again, and see the chick from the ring (or some scary shit) standing there.

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Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

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Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

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Whenever I send or receive texts, I always make it a point to have more received texts than sent ones. It makes me feel popular.

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Shutting the fridge door slowly just to see the light shut off.

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Look at pictures of people who lived a long time ago and wonder how they lived without television and the Internet.

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Looking outside the window and imagining a huge explosion destroy everything and then u surviving and trying to find a way to survive

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

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Saving some leftovers of your favorite food .... the next week its still there (:

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when you mouth words (but saying them out loud) when someone can't hear you

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wonder if anyone is on at 12 A.M. log on to a social network and realize that theres a lot of people on

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.