disgusted by people that are obsessed with poo and pee

When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

Naming every pet you've ever owned Peter Jankins

I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

Not buying a product you might have otherwise been interested in simply because you think their TV ad is stupid.

I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

Try to see nipples through body paint.

Sitting on a table at school and looking at the things u only think i do website

fist myself to the point of unconsciousness whilst masturbating to the speeches of Hitler

When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

When I'm in the shower, I talk to myself, usually about my plans for video game procedures.

Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

Call the ninja turtles by their full names.

When I need to poop in a public toilet, I poop to the side so there's no plop.

Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

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draw pictures on the mirror from the shower steam

When on a sidewalk I always try to make my last step on the block with my left foot.

When I'm in the shower I condition my pubes so they get nice and soft.

Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.