I always think I have special powers

I pick at my cuticles when I'm bored.

Everytime i take of my sweater i start singing "its getting hot in here"

wonder if the strange thing you're doing right now will pop up on this website

When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

I have to put the radio volume in multiples of three and my daughter has to put it in multiples of five so when we are together it either has to be on 15 or 30.

Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

When I am about to thumb up a comment here that has not happened to me, I first stop myself thinking "but that has not happened to me" then I remember I thumb up comments just because I like them and proceed to do so most of the times

Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

Think about what to say to the person you like and never actually say it .

Spell Checktells me I spelt something wrong even though I am certain it's right.

Remember some homework I have to do... On the day that it's due.

fist myself to the point of unconsciousness whilst masturbating to the speeches of Hitler

When someone is reading something I have to read it at sonic speed in my head before they get to the end and if i dont do it in time I get angry.

Look to the right, and see nothing. Look to the left, and see nothing. Look to the right again, and see the chick from the ring (or some scary shit) standing there.

Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

Whenever I send or receive texts, I always make it a point to have more received texts than sent ones. It makes me feel popular.

Sometimes when walking, accidently fart and then try to squeak my to sound like my shoes squeaked instead of me farting.

Shutting the fridge door slowly just to see the light shut off.

Looking outside the window and imagining a huge explosion destroy everything and then u surviving and trying to find a way to survive

Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.