Whenever I'm scared at night in my room I turn on music. Because the music will keep away people trying to get me. Obviously.

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I eat ass

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Get really annoyed when something interrupts your yawn... then try and force yourself to complete the yawn

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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When you are in a car and a sad song comes on look out the window and pretend you are in a movie.

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See a news article that looks interesting, too lazy to read the whole thing. Skim.

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I violate and then kill people, all ages and kinds... ..:But everyone does that right? I mean... Lol, I just type that because I am insecure now, and I kill when I am insecure... ...Excuse me.

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When walking on stairs, always counting how many of them there are.

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When something weird happens I nod in agreement.

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I never read the terms and conditions but I say I have

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Check behind the shower curtain for a killer.

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creating your own personal perfect partner in romance or frendship, almost like a imaginary friend (but you don't speak to them out loud)

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Keep trying to defend your point even after you've realized you're wrong in an argument

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do math problems in my head while having sex to keep from coming

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turn the colour down on your tv and pretend what you are watching is an old movie

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Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

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Everytime i take of my sweater i start singing "its getting hot in here"

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Sometimes I stop typing in the middle of a sen

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I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

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When I use deodorant, I flap my arms like a chicken a couple of times to get some air moving under there...

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Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

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Dance in the car just so the person you like will see you and be like "Aw, cute" but then they don't even see you so you stop...

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When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

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Make the water from your shower shoot from your finger and pretend to be a water-bender.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.