In elementary school whenever it was supposed to be mental math I never did it mentally.

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Talk to my cat.

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I pick at my cuticles when I'm bored.

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I often force my mind to think that i'm slowing down time at will just to feel awesome (like when walking down the street i try to make the all cars slow down).

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When I'm in the shower I condition my pubes so they get nice and soft.

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do things without turning the lights on and feel like a ninja.

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stare at someones face until they distort and then wonder why they are asking me why I'm smiling.

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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Put ear buds in nose, open mouth, instant speaker. If you don't do it try it.

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when watching a movie or tv show, i think i am the main character and when it does somthing stupid i become embaressed

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On Youtube, while reading comments notice that many people reply angrily to the same person. Wonder what they said that pissed so many people off. Try to find them in earlier posts, but fail. Live the rest of the night in depressive state.

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when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

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While waiting for my food ot cook, I'll wash the dirty dishes that I used so that I don't need to wash lots of dishes after I eat.

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think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

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Sitting on a table at school and looking at the things u only think i do website

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repeat what you just said 2 seconds ago in a group conversation thinking no one heard you

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Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

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read some comments here and wonder if people really do that

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you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

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Listen to the same songs for years on end without ever knowing the lyrics because they've been the soundtracks for your daydreams.

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I violate and then kill people, all ages and kinds... ..:But everyone does that right? I mean... Lol, I just type that because I am insecure now, and I kill when I am insecure... ...Excuse me.

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I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

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text somebody something and if they don't reply quickly, resend that same text.

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I never read the terms and conditions but I say I have

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.