I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

I love the feeling of covering my entire body in Barbisol shaving cream,shaving my cock n balls,then masturbating.have you ever done this?

Shudder when someone bites down on icey poll or an ice cube

While making yourself something to eat that takes more than 5 minuets to make. Pretending that you have your own show on a cooking station and talk like your talking to the audience the whole time.

When I need to poop in a public toilet, I poop to the side so there's no plop.

When you fart in class but try to cover it up by moving around so other people think it was just the chair squeaking.

get annoyed when people talk on the phone really loudly in front of the TV, forcing you to mute your show, resulting in you missing half of what the people are saying.

I type a comment here and secretly feel special

Check behind the shower curtain for a killer.

Go to someone's house and go and ask where something is and the person you ask just tells you without getting up (I know it doesn't go with the theme of this site but its just something annoying)

get really confused

When playing Sims, i spend more time building my house, than playing the game itself.

I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

When light goes off and cant see digital clock numbers when you are trying to sleep/wake up, i scream and get terrified because i think i got blind

You come across a movie on network television, you own it, you can see the DVD on the shelf, it would take you less then 30 seconds to put the DVD on, instead you watch it on that station, commercials and all.

Avoid as many television commercials as I can

When I use deodorant, I flap my arms like a chicken a couple of times to get some air moving under there...

Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

Spell Checktells me I spelt something wrong even though I am certain it's right.

Try to see nipples through body paint.

Watch the same movies over and over

When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.