I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

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Living in the shadow of an atheletic friend, and secretly wanting to beat them up just to prove that you're as good as they are.

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When I go to somewhere like France I always wittily comment to my friend " oh look at all those bloody foreigners as I have always thought they were tougher on immigrants

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Pretend my life is a videogame.

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Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

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Flexing your abs when you put on deodorant so you dont look fat

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Made after doomsday plans

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You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Write "my opinion thinking-aloud-sentences" on the "circle the answer" test as footnotes when I'm not sure about the answer.

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Hit the off button on the microwave three times to simulate the sound it makes when time is up.

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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look at bins as i walk past them

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Never tell her who I was talking to on the phone and watch her nosy butt get upset

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Sometimes cringe at the sound when other people scratch themselves

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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when i was i kid i use to do the balloon trick where you rubit on your head then when there is enough put it on a wooden floor and while it's followin me i put my hands out and pretended that i was controlling it

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Rubbing your scalp and watching your dandruff fall like snowflakes

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Force a piss out really hard because you're in a rush.

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I make different scenarios for different songs I listen to. I pretend the walls and couches are people. I talk to them.

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Sometimes I forget that there are spiders in my bedroom, so after I've seen one I can't sleep for several days for fear that they'll eat me if I do. Then I forget about them again and thus the cycle starts.

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I wonder if a blind person knows how colors look?

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.