When I was little and I saw disney's hercules I had no idea why Meg was working for Hades

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Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

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I eat ass

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When I'm in the shower, I'm afraid something might try to kill me so I shower with my glasses on.

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Realise logically that a chicken egg is her period. we eat chicken periods!

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Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

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When i see people even strangers , in my mind i wonder if there virgins or not .

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Rinse off salted nuts before eating them

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im going to kill that person and get away with it

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open the fridge A eat food B think

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clean my ears with finger if they feel dirty...eat it.

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get annoyed when people talk on the phone really loudly in front of the TV, forcing you to mute your show, resulting in you missing half of what the people are saying.

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I make different scenarios for different songs I listen to. I pretend the walls and couches are people. I talk to them.

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worry about other people hearing you pee when your in the bathroom.

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Stick my hand all the way to the bottom of a tub of grease.

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Write my own music without literally writing it on something even though I'm only grade 3

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Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

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when going through this website only read post that have 2 or more thumbs up

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To my comment below... Rest im peace MJ... Shhh! Mary Jane is resting!

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Randomly agree for the Terms of Service for just about everything on the internet. Then becoming very frightened at the thought that you have violated them in some way.

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Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

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I am 23 and I still wish the stalk will take back my younger brother

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When riding in a car I pump my arms to pretend I'm running at an incredible rate.

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.