Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

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When listening to headphones, I automatically start lip syncing the lyrics... But stop doing it when people look at me funny..

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I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

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Pee in the garbage at night when I don't want to wake the whole house up.

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I refuse to forward chain letters

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Saving my cash this year and not buying into the shopping hype

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Constantly look at all clocks when the minute hand/digit reads '11'

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When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

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When I'm running a bath I sometimes sit and look at myself in the mirror and act out conversations with people I've never talked to or celebrities, and when I say something that sounds good I'll repeat it over and over again until I nail huge emotions on my face.

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When i'm home, I pretend i'm famous!

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Pour the cheap shampoo I can only afford these days into the empty expensive bottle to trick myself I'm still using the good stuff.

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While driving out in the country area, I am secretly looking for Squatch

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Use the 0.3141592653589793238462643383279502884 second rule

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Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

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Put toilet paper in the toilet before I'm going to take a shit, so that the toilet won't get dirty.

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Sitting on a table at school and looking at the things u only think i do website

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Watch the same movies over and over

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Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

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I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

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Purposely scuff a shoe on pavement after the other scuffs by accident. Feel you scuffed this foot a little too much and so re-scuff the first to balance things out.

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When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

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Use é instead of e to spell Pokémon

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read some comments here and wonder if people really do that

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I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.