When i see people even strangers , in my mind i wonder if there virgins or not .

Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

Rinse off salted nuts before eating them

im going to kill that person and get away with it

open the fridge A eat food B think

clean my ears with finger if they feel dirty...eat it.

get annoyed when people talk on the phone really loudly in front of the TV, forcing you to mute your show, resulting in you missing half of what the people are saying.

I make different scenarios for different songs I listen to. I pretend the walls and couches are people. I talk to them.

worry about other people hearing you pee when your in the bathroom.

Stick my hand all the way to the bottom of a tub of grease.

When playing Sims, i spend more time building my house, than playing the game itself.

Write my own music without literally writing it on something even though I'm only grade 3

Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

To my comment below... Rest im peace MJ... Shhh! Mary Jane is resting!

when going through this website only read post that have 2 or more thumbs up

Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

I am 23 and I still wish the stalk will take back my younger brother

When riding in a car I pump my arms to pretend I'm running at an incredible rate.

Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

when im alone and in a bad mood i make stupid faces with my eyes closed and try and figure out how stupid i looked. then i start laughing hysterically because i think that im an idiot. then i repeat this process until i have to pee from laughing so hard because im already in the bathroom so why not utilize the toilet, rather than waiting for a commercial and speed-peeing because im scared that i missed some of the show i was watching :D -Grace-

Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

When I'm bored in school I always imagine the teacher asks me something and my response is starting to sing a song. Somewhen some of my friends sing along with me. Then the whole class sings this song. We run out of classroom into the hallways and every other pupil comes out their classroom to see what's happening. Then They all sing along with me. We run out of school and sing and dance like in a musical. Then I actually remind myself, its impossible that every student knows the lyrics of the song I'm just thinking of and get depressed again.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.