Never tell her who I was talking to on the phone and watch her nosy butt get upset

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read some comments here and wonder if people really do that

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I can't trill my R's

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I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

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Set Fire to the Rain

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Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

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Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

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something happens with a person that u were close to but then they become an asshole, u get mad, and when u stop talking feel really depressed even though u hate them

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wonder who wrote these things

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When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

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try not to step on cracks on the sidewalk

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Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

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laziness .... its all in the mind

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If its dark and you have to go with rhe stairs i do that running because i tink somebody is behind my

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Try to give my download speed moral support: "You can do it! YES, just stay there!" For anyone out there struggling with slow internet.. I feel your pain

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Rubbing your scalp and watching your dandruff fall like snowflakes

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Watching movies about couples with age gaps and woundering how it would feel like to be with somebody much older (or younger) than you. Would they use viagra or would you not even try to have sex with someone so old and delicate?

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When boarding the escalator, I select a specific step before getting on causing a slight queue.

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I type a comment here and secretly feel special

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I somtimes think about what I would o if I had a wish and I go into a lot of detail about it in my head and then realize it will never actually happen

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creating your own personal perfect partner in romance or frendship, almost like a imaginary friend (but you don't speak to them out loud)

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Give vocal commentary on the song I just played when I'm the only one in the car.

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After eating a banana I leave the last bit that was in the bottom

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.