fist myself to the point of unconsciousness whilst masturbating to the speeches of Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down -46

in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

thumb_up thumb_down -54

When I'm bored in school I always imagine the teacher asks me something and my response is starting to sing a song. Somewhen some of my friends sing along with me. Then the whole class sings this song. We run out of classroom into the hallways and every other pupil comes out their classroom to see what's happening. Then They all sing along with me. We run out of school and sing and dance like in a musical. Then I actually remind myself, its impossible that every student knows the lyrics of the song I'm just thinking of and get depressed again.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

when you mouth words (but saying them out loud) when someone can't hear you

thumb_up thumb_down -82

text somebody something and if they don't reply quickly, resend that same text.

thumb_up thumb_down -86

When you fart in class but try to cover it up by moving around so other people think it was just the chair squeaking.

thumb_up thumb_down -118

I can't help but wonder why people write things on web sites and don't bother checking their spelling. Now they look like an idiot no matter how funny or interesting it might have been.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Feeling guilty for something you haven't done.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

sometimes i wonder how it would be to think in another language and i try but cant

thumb_up thumb_down +5

turn the colour down on your tv and pretend what you are watching is an old movie

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Act as if you don't notice her, but you really are dying to take another look at her.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

thumb_up thumb_down -17

When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Write my own music without literally writing it on something even though I'm only grade 3

thumb_up thumb_down -27

The ability to go one hour back in time by concentrating really hard for two hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

On Youtube, while reading comments notice that many people reply angrily to the same person. Wonder what they said that pissed so many people off. Try to find them in earlier posts, but fail. Live the rest of the night in depressive state.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

When I go to somewhere like France I always wittily comment to my friend " oh look at all those bloody foreigners as I have always thought they were tougher on immigrants

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Hearing someone say something but saying "what" because you need more time to think of an answer

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Feeling like no one really "knows" me, but only what they already see/know. Most things about me my family don't know about.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Try to see nipples through body paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.