I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

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Stare off into space in the middle of a conversation

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I'm starting to ignore Hollywood, the news and experts opinions more and more.

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Wonder what would happen if you started screaming and defecating in public.

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If I have a cold or runny nose, when I'm alone I stuff tissues in my nostrils so I don't have to keep blowing my nose sooooo much.

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Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

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Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

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When someone is reading something I have to read it at sonic speed in my head before they get to the end and if i dont do it in time I get angry.

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Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

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Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

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When out I like to "people watch."

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suddenly get stage fright when in a public bathroom stall and break the awkward silence by pretending you just went in there to get loo paper to blow your nose.

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wonder y nobody facebook likes or comments on these

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Sometimes when I'm all alone, I like to rub vasceline on myself and pretend I'm a slug.

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Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

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i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

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when i was i kid i use to do the balloon trick where you rubit on your head then when there is enough put it on a wooden floor and while it's followin me i put my hands out and pretended that i was controlling it

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I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

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When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

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I can't help but wonder why people write things on web sites and don't bother checking their spelling. Now they look like an idiot no matter how funny or interesting it might have been.

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Get scared while I'm doing things on the computer like writing these comments, or other weird stuff because I think there might be a hacker watching my screen.

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skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

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When I get a worksheet or a piece of paper with BIG TITLES I immediately shade in all of the gaps in the o's, p's, d's and all other 'hole letters'. And then I start shading in all the words when I finish.

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I type a comment here and secretly feel special

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.