Feel the bed gets more comfortable the longer you put off getting into bed.

I sleep in my underpants every single night

Get a mini heart attack when your rocking on your chair and you nearly fall off

KICK THE CAN

Pee in the garbage at night when I don't want to wake the whole house up.

I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

When listening to headphones, I automatically start lip syncing the lyrics... But stop doing it when people look at me funny..

Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

Saving my cash this year and not buying into the shopping hype

I refuse to forward chain letters

Constantly look at all clocks when the minute hand/digit reads '11'

When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

When i'm home, I pretend i'm famous!

Pour the cheap shampoo I can only afford these days into the empty expensive bottle to trick myself I'm still using the good stuff.

When I'm running a bath I sometimes sit and look at myself in the mirror and act out conversations with people I've never talked to or celebrities, and when I say something that sounds good I'll repeat it over and over again until I nail huge emotions on my face.

While driving out in the country area, I am secretly looking for Squatch

Put toilet paper in the toilet before I'm going to take a shit, so that the toilet won't get dirty.

Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

Use the 0.3141592653589793238462643383279502884 second rule

Sitting on a table at school and looking at the things u only think i do website

Watch the same movies over and over

I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

play on your game for ten minutes before you realise why you stoppedd the last time

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.