When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

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I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

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I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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I feel like people next to me can read my mind so if I start thinking about something sexual it feels super awkward

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Write my own music without literally writing it on something even though I'm only grade 3

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The ability to go one hour back in time by concentrating really hard for two hours.

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On Youtube, while reading comments notice that many people reply angrily to the same person. Wonder what they said that pissed so many people off. Try to find them in earlier posts, but fail. Live the rest of the night in depressive state.

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When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

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Hearing someone say something but saying "what" because you need more time to think of an answer

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think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

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wonder if famous singers are actually the one that sings the song, or if someone else records it in the studio and then they lip sync at concerts.

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when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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wish you looked like either Kellan Lutz or Bradley Cooper! I wish magic existed now.

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Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

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Vote for the other guy

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When looking at these comments, don't like the ones with lots of comments on because you think they have too many and the others deserve your liking as they might feel left out.

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read some comments here and wonder if people really do that

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Use é instead of e to spell Pokémon

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i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

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Watching movies about couples with age gaps and woundering how it would feel like to be with somebody much older (or younger) than you. Would they use viagra or would you not even try to have sex with someone so old and delicate?

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I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

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In elementary school whenever it was supposed to be mental math I never did it mentally.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.