In public,try to make eye contact with most people.

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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when you mouth words (but saying them out loud) when someone can't hear you

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Trying to recreate all facial expressions of people on television, even animated ones!

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Assume that on another planet or galaxy there are people just like humans that look exactly like me. Like an alternate universe.

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Start thinking about how your walking, and then worry that you may lose control of your legs and fall.

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Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.

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turn the colour down on your tv and pretend what you are watching is an old movie

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stare at someones face until they distort and then wonder why they are asking me why I'm smiling.

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When I'm in the shower I condition my pubes so they get nice and soft.

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You come across a movie on network television, you own it, you can see the DVD on the shelf, it would take you less then 30 seconds to put the DVD on, instead you watch it on that station, commercials and all.

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

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Constantly look at all clocks when the minute hand/digit reads '11'

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Try to see nipples through body paint.

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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When I'm riding in the car, I'll spot a tree, make it my goal and try to beat the car on the opposite side of the road to it. (Seriously I don't think anyone else does this!)

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when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

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Here's a fun game I play if I wake up in the middle of the night: I look over at the alarm clock and see what numbers are displayed. Then I shut my eyes tightly and wait a few seconds before opening them again. If I open my eyes and see that the numbers on the alarm clock have changed, I win. If I open my eyes and they didn't, I lose.

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When my cat follows me, I pretend we're a pack or some sort of gang and i would be the leader.

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When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

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I am sure that no one else has the same mental slowness as me and my brother. When I say mauve he says maeve and we continue like this for hours. It is certainly an exciting way of eating up those motorway miles:)

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Shutting the fridge door slowly just to see the light shut off.

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When I'm home alone at night, and the lights are on so you can't see anything out the windows, I will stop randomly and stare out the window to make anyone watching me think I know that they are there.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.