Talk to my cat.

Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.

I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.

You come across a movie on network television, you own it, you can see the DVD on the shelf, it would take you less then 30 seconds to put the DVD on, instead you watch it on that station, commercials and all.

When you're alone in a room and you have to turn on the TV so it's not as silent...

Put ear buds in nose, open mouth, instant speaker. If you don't do it try it.

When I'm alone I occasionally like to give a little hump to the air. Not for sexual reasons or anything, just because it feels right.

When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

To my comment below... Rest im peace MJ... Shhh! Mary Jane is resting!

I feel like people next to me can read my mind so if I start thinking about something sexual it feels super awkward

when watching a movie or tv show, i think i am the main character and when it does somthing stupid i become embaressed

When driving and a song come on about death I switch the station because i'm afraid its going to happen to me

While waiting for my food ot cook, I'll wash the dirty dishes that I used so that I don't need to wash lots of dishes after I eat.

Stop at traffic lights thinking it will close soon, when actually remains only 5s to close second and u run like crazy.

I always paranoidly think that someone else might see what I see through my eyes he can't hear what I hear and he can't smell what I smell he can only see and if I close my eyes he falls asleep automatically I try to avoid thinking this but that's impossible

I play video games with the controller under the covers.

Put toilet paper in the toilet before I'm going to take a shit, so that the toilet won't get dirty.

Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

fist myself to the point of unconsciousness whilst masturbating to the speeches of Hitler

wish you looked like either Kellan Lutz or Bradley Cooper! I wish magic existed now.

Use é instead of e to spell Pokémon

When you can feel yourself blushing so you pretend to be preoccupied with something else.

Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.