After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

I wonder why people were happy after the last election

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

realize you are saying your thoughts outloud.

When in class, hoping that I do not get boner right before bell rings/called up.

The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

Thinking of a song to get an annoying one out of your head, then realizing that one's even worse.

Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

Having the TV turned on when using my laptop or else the silence will make me feel like someone is in my house trying to kill me.

Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

If two cars towing boats were to crash into each other, Would that make it a boating accident?

When light goes off and cant see digital clock numbers when you are trying to sleep/wake up, i scream and get terrified because i think i got blind

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i would air drum even if theres no music playing

I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

Smile like an idiot while reading this site.

Videotape my mother in the shower.

When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

I have seen a UFO

Whenever I'm scared at night in my room I turn on music. Because the music will keep away people trying to get me. Obviously.

Every new years eve I like to watch the date on my computer change all three the day, the month, and the year

I HATE minecraft gift codes and the morons who post about them. I wish those morons would get off my planet.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.