Domina Olga shows no mercy when she ride your dick

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When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

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The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

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The ability to go one hour back in time by concentrating really hard for two hours.

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I refuse to forward chain letters

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Take everything out of the fridge, and climb in it, and pretend your in a time capsule.

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Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

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In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

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Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

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When I check into a hotel room I think about the countless number of sex acts that has been performed in there.

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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Before drinking the actual soft drink, I drink the fizz as fast as I can.

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you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

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Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

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Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

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if something stands for something, i come up with my own version of it.

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Try to give my download speed moral support: "You can do it! YES, just stay there!" For anyone out there struggling with slow internet.. I feel your pain

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Do a light cough when in the toilet when there isn't no lock on the door so Ur stop someone walking in!!!

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I feel no shame that I am a camgirl online and bring in about $2800 a month just to flash guys my boobs. :)

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Check behind the shower curtain for a killer.

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

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when a sex scene comes on the tv i try make up an excuse to go somewhere like i need a drink or a pee.

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when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.