I pretend to get future messages. Like when I'm about to have a bad subject. I get a message from future me telling present me like 'Oh god. Yeah, brace yourself for science today.'

thumb_up thumb_down -26

sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

place all your achievements in your room to impress your friends

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Liking your own posts to make it seem like at least 1 person likes you. thinking that maybe someone will be slightly compelled to like it because someone already did.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Pour the cheap shampoo I can only afford these days into the empty expensive bottle to trick myself I'm still using the good stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

thumb_up thumb_down -42

The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

When I check into a hotel room I think about the countless number of sex acts that has been performed in there.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Brake for tail-gaters

thumb_up thumb_down -52

you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

thumb_up thumb_down -52

In case you have the ears pierced, take out the piece, and smell it, even if it smells so bad, you like the how it smells... lol

thumb_up thumb_down -56

strt thinking about something spinning, then cant stop no matter how hard you try.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

When someones talking to a group of people that I'm in and says something bad that I do but think nobody else does, I stand perfectly still and don't blink and breath as quietly as possible until the next subject arrives.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Everytime I have ear buds in and I hear myself breathing, I think others can hear it too so I slow my breathing or hold my breath.

thumb_up thumb_down -90

push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Domina Olga shows no mercy when she ride your dick

thumb_up thumb_down -1

wait up to 14 days just to find the opportunity to use one, really good, joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.