when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

thumb_up thumb_down -65

when you mouth words (but saying them out loud) when someone can't hear you

thumb_up thumb_down -89

Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

thumb_up thumb_down +40

The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

thumb_up thumb_down

I feel like my blanket is an indestructible shield against any monsters that might try to get me at night. If any part of you is out of the covers, you're screwed. lol -ML

thumb_up thumb_down

Poop naked.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

think about what im gonna say abillon times in my head before i say it -jesse

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

On Youtube, while reading comments notice that many people reply angrily to the same person. Wonder what they said that pissed so many people off. Try to find them in earlier posts, but fail. Live the rest of the night in depressive state.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

I tell inanimate objects what to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

when i talk to someone, and the one where i am talking with is saying a sentence very fast, am going to repeat the whole sentence in my head and then it sounds really weird.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

thumb_up thumb_down -44

When I'm running a bath I sometimes sit and look at myself in the mirror and act out conversations with people I've never talked to or celebrities, and when I say something that sounds good I'll repeat it over and over again until I nail huge emotions on my face.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Run up all stairs two at a time, and memorize all the staircases with odd number of steps. On those, I start with one step so I can end on a two.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

always check thde back seat before starting the car

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.