I eat ass

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wonder who wrote these things

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When someones talking to a group of people that I'm in and says something bad that I do but think nobody else does, I stand perfectly still and don't blink and breath as quietly as possible until the next subject arrives.

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join online argument even though you have no idea what the argument is about

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Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

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Shudder when someone bites down on icey poll or an ice cube

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Everytime I have ear buds in and I hear myself breathing, I think others can hear it too so I slow my breathing or hold my breath.

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I check behind the the shower curtin before I use the bathroom at night.

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When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.

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I feel no shame that I am a camgirl online and bring in about $2800 a month just to flash guys my boobs. :)

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I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

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Sometimes I try to solve a math problem using my finger and my thigh, and when I make a mistake a erase it with my hand.

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Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

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thinking your pants are wet when you only just sat down for a long time

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I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

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feed a gecko worms every day, not the good worms though...

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When I am doing something that involves using one hand I feel weird because I don't know what to do with my other hand

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When taking a dump in a public restroom, if someone else walks in, I wait until they leave the restroom before finishing up and leaving the stall, just to make sure they don't see who I am.

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Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

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i would air drum even if theres no music playing

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I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

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check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

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Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

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place all your achievements in your room to impress your friends

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.