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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

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When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

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I have short haircuts so I don't have messed up hair in the morning (It's a real time saver)

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Sometimes I make awkward eye contact with strangers. And I quickly look away. And then I look back. And then look away again. And I keep being compelled to stare awkwardly at the random stranger for no reason.

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This is kind of embarrassing... after I watched "Truman Show" I went home and talked to my mirror like Jim Carrey does in the film.

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If two cars towing boats were to crash into each other, Would that make it a boating accident?

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when you dont know what someone said so you just awkwardly start laughing and it turns out not to be funny.

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Write my own music without literally writing it on something even though I'm only grade 3

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Put a few bits of toilet paper in the toilet before having a poo so there is no splash!

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Purposely scuff a shoe on pavement after the other scuffs by accident. Feel you scuffed this foot a little too much and so re-scuff the first to balance things out.

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when home alone, I sing a song like im performing it in front of a crowd of a thousand people and any object nearby usually becomes my microphone

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

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When I'm home alone at night, and the lights are on so you can't see anything out the windows, I will stop randomly and stare out the window to make anyone watching me think I know that they are there.

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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ur parents never pay attention to u but when they do they r yelling at u

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When you're bored or alone, you think of an argument you had with a friend recently, then think of all the things you should've said and get all powered up inside, but then you realise it's too late -_-

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Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

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I brace myself and close my eyes when I send an email to my teachers or parents.

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.