Randomly think odd scenarios in your head and say if that happened this is what i would do and then forget about it the next day

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When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

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I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

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check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

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place all your achievements in your room to impress your friends

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I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

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flushing the toilet eventho not yet finish pee-ing. So that the water sucks it right after the last drop of your pee. Saves 2-3seconds of your life.

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I see some one I have a crush on in the hallway and I walk towards them and brush my arm against them and be like OMG I TOUCHED HER!

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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pluck dried pieces of poop in your butt hair

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Vote for the other guy

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Brake for tail-gaters

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Before drinking the actual soft drink, I drink the fizz as fast as I can.

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something happens with a person that u were close to but then they become an asshole, u get mad, and when u stop talking feel really depressed even though u hate them

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I HATE minecraft gift codes and the morons who post about them. I wish those morons would get off my planet.

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When I get the chance, I always nick a chip from my mum's or dad's dinner.

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When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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If i've been thinking about a particular person a lot, afterwards if people are telling a story or describing a scenario, I always picture the person I was thinking of before as the person as the main character in their story/scenario.

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In elementary school whenever it was supposed to be mental math I never did it mentally.

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Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

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When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.