When someones talking to a group of people that I'm in and says something bad that I do but think nobody else does, I stand perfectly still and don't blink and breath as quietly as possible until the next subject arrives.

when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

See a news article that looks interesting, too lazy to read the whole thing. Skim.

i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

Call the ninja turtles by their full names.

Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

When you're bored or alone, you think of an argument you had with a friend recently, then think of all the things you should've said and get all powered up inside, but then you realise it's too late -_-

Talk to my cat.

Try to fly by jumping and then discover you can't

I meow when my cat meows.

Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

I wonder what would happen if time froze and only I could move. I think about all the things I could do.

I fantasize about my idol as I try to fall sleep at night. He's Michael Jackson.

I pick a green crayon from crayon box but it's one of those yellow-greens that look yellow and now my clover will be half yellow forever.

Whenever I'm scared at night in my room I turn on music. Because the music will keep away people trying to get me. Obviously.

Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

suddenly get stage fright when in a public bathroom stall and break the awkward silence by pretending you just went in there to get loo paper to blow your nose.

I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

Listen to the same songs for years on end without ever knowing the lyrics because they've been the soundtracks for your daydreams.

When i see people even strangers , in my mind i wonder if there virgins or not .

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.