I eat ass

wonder who wrote these things

When someones talking to a group of people that I'm in and says something bad that I do but think nobody else does, I stand perfectly still and don't blink and breath as quietly as possible until the next subject arrives.

join online argument even though you have no idea what the argument is about

Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

Shudder when someone bites down on icey poll or an ice cube

Everytime I have ear buds in and I hear myself breathing, I think others can hear it too so I slow my breathing or hold my breath.

I check behind the the shower curtin before I use the bathroom at night.

When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.

I feel no shame that I am a camgirl online and bring in about $2800 a month just to flash guys my boobs. :)

I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

Sometimes I try to solve a math problem using my finger and my thigh, and when I make a mistake a erase it with my hand.

Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

thinking your pants are wet when you only just sat down for a long time

I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

feed a gecko worms every day, not the good worms though...

When I am doing something that involves using one hand I feel weird because I don't know what to do with my other hand

When taking a dump in a public restroom, if someone else walks in, I wait until they leave the restroom before finishing up and leaving the stall, just to make sure they don't see who I am.

Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

i would air drum even if theres no music playing

I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

place all your achievements in your room to impress your friends

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.