when I have an itch on my hand I scratch it with my stubble

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See a news article that looks interesting, too lazy to read the whole thing. Skim.

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Everytime I have ear buds in and I hear myself breathing, I think others can hear it too so I slow my breathing or hold my breath.

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I wonder why people were happy after the last election

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turn the colour down on your tv and pretend what you are watching is an old movie

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

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Try to fly by jumping and then discover you can't

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Feel like you're the only one pressured into giving gum away by your friends.

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Make hand gestures when talking on phone

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when dialing a number, i hear the number itself when it is dialed

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On Youtube, while reading comments notice that many people reply angrily to the same person. Wonder what they said that pissed so many people off. Try to find them in earlier posts, but fail. Live the rest of the night in depressive state.

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When I go to somewhere like France I always wittily comment to my friend " oh look at all those bloody foreigners as I have always thought they were tougher on immigrants

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pluck dried pieces of poop in your butt hair

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Thinking about what other poeple are doing right now... Like someone solving world hunger and your sitting there playing games and having fun with friends that are nice and healthy.

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always hurt urself and blame the object for hurting u

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When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

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always check thde back seat before starting the car

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the time where you sit behind a person that smells like BO badly!!!

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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If its dark and you have to go with rhe stairs i do that running because i tink somebody is behind my

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I can't help but wonder why people write things on web sites and don't bother checking their spelling. Now they look like an idiot no matter how funny or interesting it might have been.

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At school I go along with the norm even though inside I HATE it!!!!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.