Put a few bits of toilet paper in the toilet before having a poo so there is no splash!

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When I am walking at night, I see a slight shadow behind me for a second, I walk faster, I see the shadow again, I think it is some kind of scary monster and then I decide to run for my life. When I get back home, I realize the shadow is my shadow.

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when home alone, I sing a song like im performing it in front of a crowd of a thousand people and any object nearby usually becomes my microphone

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

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i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

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After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

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Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

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Pee in the shower

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When ever I'm walking up or down stairs, i always have to step on the last step with my left foot.

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When walking into a smelly bathroom, hold your breath so you don't have to breathe in the poo air.

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

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when dialing a number, i hear the number itself when it is dialed

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When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

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When driving and a song come on about death I switch the station because i'm afraid its going to happen to me

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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always hurt urself and blame the object for hurting u

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Every new years eve I like to watch the date on my computer change all three the day, the month, and the year

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Use é instead of e to spell Pokémon

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When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

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When I'm home alone at night, and the lights are on so you can't see anything out the windows, I will stop randomly and stare out the window to make anyone watching me think I know that they are there.

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resting your head from your face to your hand and then you realize you face now looks disfigured.

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Being afraid to close your eyes when you're washing your hair in the shower because you think a murderer will be right there when you open your eyes again. That or Scared to shower when your home alone at night.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.