I have short haircuts so I don't have messed up hair in the morning (It's a real time saver)

when a sex scene comes on the tv i try make up an excuse to go somewhere like i need a drink or a pee.

Not get any thumb ups on a post. Turns out there really are some things only I do...

when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.

When I am surfing the web and i go to another website i see an ad that was about something i just viewed from previous website I wonder if a little man is inside my pc keeping catalog of every website that i visit.

There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.

moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

The ability to go one hour back in time by concentrating really hard for two hours.

Liking your own posts to make it seem like at least 1 person likes you. thinking that maybe someone will be slightly compelled to like it because someone already did.

I pick a green crayon from crayon box but it's one of those yellow-greens that look yellow and now my clover will be half yellow forever.

Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

My dreams are almost always bizarre in some way - the only time they're ever normal is when they're the premonition type, and then they're about completely uneventful things but accurate down to the tiniest detail.

Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

Write "my opinion thinking-aloud-sentences" on the "circle the answer" test as footnotes when I'm not sure about the answer.

Imagining yourself in the "Last Supper" scene. (in Jesus's spot matter of fact)

Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.

strt thinking about something spinning, then cant stop no matter how hard you try.

Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

When walking on stairs, always counting how many of them there are.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.