My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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when dialing a number, i hear the number itself when it is dialed

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I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

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On Youtube, while reading comments notice that many people reply angrily to the same person. Wonder what they said that pissed so many people off. Try to find them in earlier posts, but fail. Live the rest of the night in depressive state.

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When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

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When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

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always hurt urself and blame the object for hurting u

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pluck dried pieces of poop in your butt hair

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Thinking about what other poeple are doing right now... Like someone solving world hunger and your sitting there playing games and having fun with friends that are nice and healthy.

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Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

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When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

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always check thde back seat before starting the car

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the time where you sit behind a person that smells like BO badly!!!

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See a news article that looks interesting, too lazy to read the whole thing. Skim.

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I can't help but wonder why people write things on web sites and don't bother checking their spelling. Now they look like an idiot no matter how funny or interesting it might have been.

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When you're bored or alone, you think of an argument you had with a friend recently, then think of all the things you should've said and get all powered up inside, but then you realise it's too late -_-

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Burp, and then automatically say burp afterwards.

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When listening to music on computer make sure your singing the words and act cool just incase the singer of that song and some other people you admire are watching you threw your webcam.

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turn the colour down on your tv and pretend what you are watching is an old movie

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Try to fly by jumping and then discover you can't

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I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

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Stepping on a concrete sidewalk square the exact amount of times as the others.

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think that the whole world is a dollhouse and we are being controlled by giant people above who live in a whole differnt world

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Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.