Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

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place all your achievements in your room to impress your friends

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Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Liking your own posts to make it seem like at least 1 person likes you. thinking that maybe someone will be slightly compelled to like it because someone already did.

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Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

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Pour the cheap shampoo I can only afford these days into the empty expensive bottle to trick myself I'm still using the good stuff.

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When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

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When I check into a hotel room I think about the countless number of sex acts that has been performed in there.

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

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Brake for tail-gaters

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strt thinking about something spinning, then cant stop no matter how hard you try.

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When someones talking to a group of people that I'm in and says something bad that I do but think nobody else does, I stand perfectly still and don't blink and breath as quietly as possible until the next subject arrives.

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Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

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Everytime I have ear buds in and I hear myself breathing, I think others can hear it too so I slow my breathing or hold my breath.

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Domina Olga shows no mercy when she ride your dick

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wait up to 14 days just to find the opportunity to use one, really good, joke.

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Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

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The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

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Make the water from your shower shoot from your finger and pretend to be a water-bender.

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I feel like people next to me can read my mind so if I start thinking about something sexual it feels super awkward

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.