When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

thumb_up thumb_down -62

After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

thumb_up thumb_down -86

I wonder why people were happy after the last election

thumb_up thumb_down -128

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

realize you are saying your thoughts outloud.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

When in class, hoping that I do not get boner right before bell rings/called up.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Thinking of a song to get an annoying one out of your head, then realizing that one's even worse.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Having the TV turned on when using my laptop or else the silence will make me feel like someone is in my house trying to kill me.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

thumb_up thumb_down -19

If two cars towing boats were to crash into each other, Would that make it a boating accident?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

When light goes off and cant see digital clock numbers when you are trying to sleep/wake up, i scream and get terrified because i think i got blind

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -23

i would air drum even if theres no music playing

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I wonder what would happen if time froze and only I could move. I think about all the things I could do.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Videotape my mother in the shower.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

I have seen a UFO

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Whenever I'm scared at night in my room I turn on music. Because the music will keep away people trying to get me. Obviously.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Every new years eve I like to watch the date on my computer change all three the day, the month, and the year

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.