When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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If I have my computer and I have to do something quietly (because there are other people about) I hear music in heaphones, just so it seems to myself that I'm more discreet, as I can't hear myself.

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The ability to go one hour back in time by concentrating really hard for two hours.

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place all your achievements in your room to impress your friends

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Imagine that other people can see what im doing, then try to act differently.

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when dialing a number, i hear the number itself when it is dialed

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Finally understand the meaning of a song i used to like as a child....... Im a Barbie girl in a Barbie world-Noel

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

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When I go to somewhere like France I always wittily comment to my friend " oh look at all those bloody foreigners as I have always thought they were tougher on immigrants

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flushing the toilet eventho not yet finish pee-ing. So that the water sucks it right after the last drop of your pee. Saves 2-3seconds of your life.

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I think of unbelievably perverted things seconds before I am about to cum when masturbating.

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I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

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In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

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At the store then mom leaves to get something then u start panicking as the cashier begins paying and you thing she will charge yo already

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sometime i poop in my hand, then put it in the toilet so it makes less noise and the water doesn't splash up my butt.

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I HATE minecraft gift codes and the morons who post about them. I wish those morons would get off my planet.

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you collect best whatsapp status for your whatsapp and facebook at techcloud7.org

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eat curry and don't complain about its spiciness ...if you're not white

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

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Call the ninja turtles by their full names.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.