Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

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Put a few bits of toilet paper in the toilet before having a poo so there is no splash!

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Get to lazy to stand up in the shower so I sit down in the shower

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Randomly agree for the Terms of Service for just about everything on the internet. Then becoming very frightened at the thought that you have violated them in some way.

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Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

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When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

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Purposely scuff a shoe on pavement after the other scuffs by accident. Feel you scuffed this foot a little too much and so re-scuff the first to balance things out.

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The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

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join online argument even though you have no idea what the argument is about

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When I get the chance, I always nick a chip from my mum's or dad's dinner.

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Comment on here and wait a few days and see if I got some likes . CMOOON , You do it .

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sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

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Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

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Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

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I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

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When walking into a smelly bathroom, hold your breath so you don't have to breathe in the poo air.

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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If two cars towing boats were to crash into each other, Would that make it a boating accident?

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i would air drum even if theres no music playing

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think that the whole world is a dollhouse and we are being controlled by giant people above who live in a whole differnt world

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Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

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"Turn the tv volume with my feet" "Take a wood stick and think it's a sword"

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Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.