always check thde back seat before starting the car

I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

Seriously I am tired but, I read the fucking solvemedia stating "forget this", then I stood there for a moment having just forgot what I was supposed to type. "Was I not supposed to forget what I just read?" Nero: BRAINWASHING! FORGET THIS AND LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR MOTHER! IM LEUTANANT BANGUS YOUR MUTHERUS YOU IDIOT!

I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

I feel like my blanket is an indestructible shield against any monsters that might try to get me at night. If any part of you is out of the covers, you're screwed. lol -ML

Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

Worry that I'm will go schizophrenic.

When walking into a smelly bathroom, hold your breath so you don't have to breathe in the poo air.

I meow when my cat meows.

When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

Has anyone else ever wondered why the women in shows and movies lie with the blanket covering them after apparently having sex with the other person.

Poop naked.

I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

think that the whole world is a dollhouse and we are being controlled by giant people above who live in a whole differnt world

think about what im gonna say abillon times in my head before i say it -jesse

Write my own music without literally writing it on something even though I'm only grade 3

Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

When I am doing something that involves using one hand I feel weird because I don't know what to do with my other hand

I want to trade bodies and thought processes with my crush, so we could understand each other better.

I fantasize about my idol as I try to fall sleep at night. He's Michael Jackson.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.