When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

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I wonder what would happen if time froze and only I could move. I think about all the things I could do.

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I fantasize about my idol as I try to fall sleep at night. He's Michael Jackson.

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This song will not come out of my head!

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Whenever I'm scared at night in my room I turn on music. Because the music will keep away people trying to get me. Obviously.

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Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

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suddenly get stage fright when in a public bathroom stall and break the awkward silence by pretending you just went in there to get loo paper to blow your nose.

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whenever I lucid dream, I find that I don't do much

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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Listen to the same songs for years on end without ever knowing the lyrics because they've been the soundtracks for your daydreams.

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When i see people even strangers , in my mind i wonder if there virgins or not .

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Try to give my download speed moral support: "You can do it! YES, just stay there!" For anyone out there struggling with slow internet.. I feel your pain

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i see almost everything as a sign

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Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

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When you're bored or alone, you think of an argument you had with a friend recently, then think of all the things you should've said and get all powered up inside, but then you realise it's too late -_-

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The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

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You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

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Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

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Try to fly by jumping and then discover you can't

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Poop naked.

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I meow when my cat meows.

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.