When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

put the volume on the TV as an even number, and feeling uncomfortable if it's on an odd number

It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

wait up to 14 days just to find the opportunity to use one, really good, joke.

when going through this website only read post that have 2 or more thumbs up

To my comment below... Rest im peace MJ... Shhh! Mary Jane is resting!

I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

When a teacher at school leaves a line of pen on the big whiteboard, my attention can NOT be drawn from it.

Have deja vu while talking to someone and then stop listening to what they are saying for a few seconds till the feeling passes, then nod like you have been listening the whole time.

I have walked into a sliding glass door

Use the 0.3141592653589793238462643383279502884 second rule

fist myself to the point of unconsciousness whilst masturbating to the speeches of Hitler

think that you are wasting way too much time on this website and that you could be exercising right now or be doing a million more productive things than righting about doing more productive things on things you think only you do.

When my cat follows me, I pretend we're a pack or some sort of gang and i would be the leader.

Every new years eve I like to watch the date on my computer change all three the day, the month, and the year

It is really difficult for me to lose control of myself

make mini paper airoplanes in boring lessons and pretend you are flying them

something happens with a person that u were close to but then they become an asshole, u get mad, and when u stop talking feel really depressed even though u hate them

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

When you are in a car and a sad song comes on look out the window and pretend you are in a movie.

I flick my boogers on the carpet knowing that I can just vacuum them up later.

when you mouth words (but saying them out loud) when someone can't hear you

pick leaves of bushes while im walking and rip them up into small pieces

get caught up in youtube comment arguments

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.