I pick a green crayon from crayon box but it's one of those yellow-greens that look yellow and now my clover will be half yellow forever.

I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

When i'm home, I pretend i'm famous!

Get to lazy to stand up in the shower so I sit down in the shower

Use the 0.3141592653589793238462643383279502884 second rule

Saying an awkward word enough times so that it doesn't sound like a real word anymore

only turning the TV volume to numbers ending in 5

I put a small amount of water in glasses and freeze them for hot days when I want a cool drink

Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

read some comments here and wonder if people really do that

trip over nothing. break into spontaneous dancing.

Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

something happens with a person that u were close to but then they become an asshole, u get mad, and when u stop talking feel really depressed even though u hate them

Listen to song and think of a great montage that would go with it.

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

When you are in a car and a sad song comes on look out the window and pretend you are in a movie.

Play poly-rhythmic drum beats along with my turn signal on my car.

Drink half the water in a water bottle and then swish it around pretending to drown little people inside it.

Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

when playing games like grand theft auto I drive normally like all the other people in the game when i'm bored

Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

Spend several minutes to write a comment on a website, only to decide not no submit it after all.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.