I tell inanimate objects what to do.

flushing the toilet eventho not yet finish pee-ing. So that the water sucks it right after the last drop of your pee. Saves 2-3seconds of your life.

Remember some homework I have to do... On the day that it's due.

when you get a runny nose suddenly checks for blood oh good its clear

Seeing someone gettin roasted for something and then making sure you dont do the same thing.

I put a small amount of water in glasses and freeze them for hot days when I want a cool drink

Every new years eve I like to watch the date on my computer change all three the day, the month, and the year

In case you have the ears pierced, take out the piece, and smell it, even if it smells so bad, you like the how it smells... lol

I brush my teeth while im in the shower

Saying something stupid and then claiming it was an inside joke so you don't look stupid.

When something says "I have read and agree to the terms of service" I quickly skim through it nd act like I read it.

Looking outside the window and imagining a huge explosion destroy everything and then u surviving and trying to find a way to survive

When sitting with my laptop on the sofa, and a family member is watching TV in the same room, chuckle occasionally at the screen, just so they know you're not watching porn or something.

Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

Think about Facebook chats when your offline!? P.S Am I the only one, REALLY!

Everytime I look at the clock it see so say 4 20 9 11 or 11 11

Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

when playing games like grand theft auto I drive normally like all the other people in the game when i'm bored

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

At school I go along with the norm even though inside I HATE it!!!!

I constantly get itches. On awkward parts of my body. In public places. And it's torture.

push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.