If I am waiting on someone and they are late, I start mentally listing their faults, flaws and mistakes but feel kind of bad for doing it when they finally show up.

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Assume that on another planet or galaxy there are people just like humans that look exactly like me. Like an alternate universe.

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get caught up in youtube comment arguments

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push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

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When you think thoughts, you think them in complete sentences as if you were saying them and in your accent.

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Go to someone's house and go and ask where something is and the person you ask just tells you without getting up (I know it doesn't go with the theme of this site but its just something annoying)

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When someone is talking to me and I'm not really listening, when it gets quiet I say 'that's crazy' so they think I'm listening.

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Create the perfect song/poem/philosophical theory/scientific discovery right before you fall asleep and forget it in the morning.

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Pee in the shower

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sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

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I wonder what would happen if time froze and only I could move. I think about all the things I could do.

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Always check the other side of the shower curtain when showering out of fear that someone is on the other side

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I feel like people next to me can read my mind so if I start thinking about something sexual it feels super awkward

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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Reading these, realizing that you don't do some of the things on the top of the list, and wondering if you're weird.

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start planning Halloween costumes on November first.

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

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Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

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Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.

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I want to trade bodies and thought processes with my crush, so we could understand each other better.

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Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

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Smile like an idiot while reading this site.

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When I'm reading a book and I come to a word that is long or difficult to pronounce every time I come to that word again I pronounce it 'manamanam'.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.