When someone is talking to me and I'm not really listening, when it gets quiet I say 'that's crazy' so they think I'm listening.

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sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

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chewing icecream before you swallow it

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I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine

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When realizing i'm being a little bitchy, I laugh and smile right after my sentence to make myself seem a little nicer.

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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I'm a female. Sometimes I pee in the shower just so that I can try to aim my pee at the drain. This way I can imagine what it's like to pee with a doodle.

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When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

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start planning Halloween costumes on November first.

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Saving my cash this year and not buying into the shopping hype

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I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

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I choose not to post a comment on some subjects because I know there will be a hundred others that will be the same.

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When I'm running a bath I sometimes sit and look at myself in the mirror and act out conversations with people I've never talked to or celebrities, and when I say something that sounds good I'll repeat it over and over again until I nail huge emotions on my face.

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Boring car ride? Read every food & drinks rapper you can find .

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I have never watched Star Wars.

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When i'm home, I pretend i'm famous!

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My dreams are almost always bizarre in some way - the only time they're ever normal is when they're the premonition type, and then they're about completely uneventful things but accurate down to the tiniest detail.

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It is really difficult for me to lose control of myself

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Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

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Sometimes when I'm all alone, I like to rub vasceline on myself and pretend I'm a slug.

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Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

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If its dark and you have to go with rhe stairs i do that running because i tink somebody is behind my

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Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.