Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

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Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

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Being afraid to close your eyes when you're washing your hair in the shower because you think a murderer will be right there when you open your eyes again. That or Scared to shower when your home alone at night.

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Assume that on another planet or galaxy there are people just like humans that look exactly like me. Like an alternate universe.

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Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

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Feel like puhing the crap out of people who talk loud in public places.

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If I turn in a circle I have to turn the other way to balance it out and feel even!

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Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

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I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

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I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.

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sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

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moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

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I say random stuff when I wake up. Just to make sure my voice is still working.

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When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

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Reading these, realizing that you don't do some of the things on the top of the list, and wondering if you're weird.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Feeling like no one really "knows" me, but only what they already see/know. Most things about me my family don't know about.

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only feel the need to click one of the related sites that draws you after youve clicked 'next page'

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I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

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When i'm home, I pretend i'm famous!

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fart and talk thinking it will cover the smell

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.