I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

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I have walked into a sliding glass door

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Wanting to be the Walmart baby model as a kid ^_^

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I pick a green crayon from crayon box but it's one of those yellow-greens that look yellow and now my clover will be half yellow forever.

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Boring car ride? Read every food & drinks rapper you can find .

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My dreams are almost always bizarre in some way - the only time they're ever normal is when they're the premonition type, and then they're about completely uneventful things but accurate down to the tiniest detail.

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think that you are wasting way too much time on this website and that you could be exercising right now or be doing a million more productive things than righting about doing more productive things on things you think only you do.

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When my cat follows me, I pretend we're a pack or some sort of gang and i would be the leader.

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Every new years eve I like to watch the date on my computer change all three the day, the month, and the year

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Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

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In case you have the ears pierced, take out the piece, and smell it, even if it smells so bad, you like the how it smells... lol

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Hit the off button on the microwave three times to simulate the sound it makes when time is up.

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Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

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when you mouth words (but saying them out loud) when someone can't hear you

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Give vocal commentary on the song I just played when I'm the only one in the car.

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Feel like puhing the crap out of people who talk loud in public places.

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Poop naked.

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Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

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When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

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I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.

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I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

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I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

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Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

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sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.