Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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Make hand gestures when talking on phone

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right before I go to sleep, I think about a certain situation. so I will dream about that

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Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

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To my comment below... Rest im peace MJ... Shhh! Mary Jane is resting!

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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Make the water from your shower shoot from your finger and pretend to be a water-bender.

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When I'm in the shower I act like I'm filming a music video.

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check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

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Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.

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In case you have the ears pierced, take out the piece, and smell it, even if it smells so bad, you like the how it smells... lol

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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When I drop something, I stand there and watch it fall, I stand still because I'm afraid that I'll maybe mess up something else, instead of picking it up quickly. Am I the only one? ;)

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It's hot but I still have on covers

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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make mini paper airoplanes in boring lessons and pretend you are flying them

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sing like a pro in da shower

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Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

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when riding home on my bike with music on pretenend im in a race with no1 and commentate on iend get really exccited on the last straight especielly when a rocky soundtrack song comes on

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Drink half the water in a water bottle and then swish it around pretending to drown little people inside it.

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Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

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Watch scary movies even though your afraid of the dark.

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When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

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text somebody something and if they don't reply quickly, resend that same text.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.