Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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oh snap, i got a boner. hope nobody notices

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Trying to recreate all facial expressions of people on television, even animated ones!

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when being in the bathroom at night, avoid looking in the mirror

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If I'm walking across a road and a car stops to allow me to pass, I say 'Thank you' even though I know full well they cannot hear me.

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In elementary school whenever it was supposed to be mental math I never did it mentally.

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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When I go to bed, I imagine how I would deal with intruders, then I can't sleep.

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If some makes you mad you do things alot better than you would if you were not mad

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

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When walking into a smelly bathroom, hold your breath so you don't have to breathe in the poo air.

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I have a band in my head that performs for me every time I listen to music.

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I hate other people's mirrors, they make me look different

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When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

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Think about what to say to the person you like and never actually say it .

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Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

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I have the idea that i'm the only one who looks at this site.

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Everytime i take of my sweater i start singing "its getting hot in here"

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place all your achievements in your room to impress your friends

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There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

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Saving my cash this year and not buying into the shopping hype

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Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.