Sitting next to a banana called James

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Pee in the garbage at night when I don't want to wake the whole house up.

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Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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I want to trade bodies and thought processes with my crush, so we could understand each other better.

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I look behind me and out of my window every 10 minutes while I'm sitting at my desk because I'm scared something's gonna be there.

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When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

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When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

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has a plastic bag full of plastic bags in your house

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

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I apologize, when i bump against things.

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misread dig bick

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Look at pictures of people who lived a long time ago and wonder how they lived without television and the Internet.

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When I get the chance, I always nick a chip from my mum's or dad's dinner.

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hug the pillow at night so it protects me from monsters

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Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

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resting your head from your face to your hand and then you realize you face now looks disfigured.

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When I have an argument with someone and they're correcting my grammar over a word that I obviously made up but they're grammar/slash spelling skills suck I want to end them.

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Only I CAN TYPE FUCKlNG FUCKlNG FUCKlNG AS MANY FUCKlNG TIMES I FUCKlNG WANT! Moral the friendly r*pist: FUCKlNG COOL!

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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i see almost everything as a sign

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Sometimes when I'm all alone, I like to rub vasceline on myself and pretend I'm a slug.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.