I chew around the center of carrots.

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clean my ears with finger if they feel dirty...eat it.

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when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

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i always think people can hear my thoughts.

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Burp, and then automatically say burp afterwards.

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Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

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When walking into a smelly bathroom, hold your breath so you don't have to breathe in the poo air.

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if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

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Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

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Write my own music without literally writing it on something even though I'm only grade 3

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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play my ipod all night till my eyes hurt

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When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

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When I go to somewhere like France I always wittily comment to my friend " oh look at all those bloody foreigners as I have always thought they were tougher on immigrants

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

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Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.