In case you have the ears pierced, take out the piece, and smell it, even if it smells so bad, you like the how it smells... lol

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When something says "I have read and agree to the terms of service" I quickly skim through it nd act like I read it.

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sing like a pro in da shower

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I like wet humping better than f*cking. but sometimes it slips in anyway, and it's that's pretty enjoyable too. and mt girlfriend is cool with. ... so it's actualy pretty whatevs either way. but wet humping is my jam.

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Not wanting to think about something but your brain thinks about it because you are trying not to think about it so much.

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think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

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Listen to song and think of a great montage that would go with it.

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resting your head from your face to your hand and then you realize you face now looks disfigured.

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when playing games like grand theft auto I drive normally like all the other people in the game when i'm bored

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I flick my boogers on the carpet knowing that I can just vacuum them up later.

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Watching movies about couples with age gaps and woundering how it would feel like to be with somebody much older (or younger) than you. Would they use viagra or would you not even try to have sex with someone so old and delicate?

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When it is raining and a sad song comes on the radio, I look out the window and pretend I am in a movie. -Cocobear

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I make different scenarios for different songs I listen to. I pretend the walls and couches are people. I talk to them.

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push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because fuck the NSA.

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Keep trying to defend your point even after you've realized you're wrong in an argument

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Act as if you don't notice her, but you really are dying to take another look at her.

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Embarassingly repeatedly use of the word "bro" when irritated or excited.

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Decide to think about important things in the shower, but continually lose the train of thought and eventually give up.

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I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

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I wonder what would happen if time froze and only I could move. I think about all the things I could do.

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Pick out an object ahead of me on the footpath and guess which foot will step closest to it

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When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

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Pour the cheap shampoo I can only afford these days into the empty expensive bottle to trick myself I'm still using the good stuff.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.