i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

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When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

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I wonder if a blind person knows how colors look?

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Keep trying to defend your point even after you've realized you're wrong in an argument

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Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

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Talk to my cat.

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I sometimes feel someone is watching me and speak towards it in a calming tone, only to again speak to myself telling myself im just being silly... only to turn my head and look behind me just in case.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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when i'm at the computer i say out of loud what i'm typing

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I refuse to imagine good things happening to me, because if I did, it won't come true and I end up being suck at everything.

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Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

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Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.

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Has anyone else ever wondered why the women in shows and movies lie with the blanket covering them after apparently having sex with the other person.

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Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

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I peel tiny strings off of cheese sticks because it's more fun and tastes better.

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When I create a situation in my mind where someone is making me mad, then I actually get mad.

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When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

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Go to the kitchen to eat, forget what I'm doing, go back to whatever I was doing, and realizing that I'm hungry.

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I hate other people's mirrors, they make me look different

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While watching a movie, I hold my breath whenever there is a scene with the main character underwater just to see how long i would last in that situation.

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when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

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check shower for murder then pee

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.