Saying something stupid and then claiming it was an inside joke so you don't look stupid.

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Shutting the fridge door slowly just to see the light shut off.

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Run back into your room when your microwaving something

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Sometimes when walking, accidently fart and then try to squeak my to sound like my shoes squeaked instead of me farting.

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make mini paper airoplanes in boring lessons and pretend you are flying them

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Listen to the same songs for years on end without ever knowing the lyrics because they've been the soundtracks for your daydreams.

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Stepping on a LEGO block and instantly screaming and leap onto the bed.

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Drink half the water in a water bottle and then swish it around pretending to drown little people inside it.

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I violate and then kill people, all ages and kinds... ..:But everyone does that right? I mean... Lol, I just type that because I am insecure now, and I kill when I am insecure... ...Excuse me.

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I hate when people say for example,if something is $3.99 they say its four dollars.

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Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

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Rubbing your scalp and watching your dandruff fall like snowflakes

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Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

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I type a comment here and secretly feel special

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I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

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wait up to 14 days just to find the opportunity to use one, really good, joke.

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I sometimes feel someone is watching me and speak towards it in a calming tone, only to again speak to myself telling myself im just being silly... only to turn my head and look behind me just in case.

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Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

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I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.

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Try to use my "Brain Power" to pick up things when I am too lazy to get up and get them.

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I wish I can go somewhere where there is no influences trying to get me to buy a product or be a certain way

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

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i have conversations in my head about showing someone some music and end up playing specific parts of various songs on my ipod and memorise the timings just in case it does happen

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.