- Things You Think Only You Do

Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

when you kill a bug you act like a god and yell something before you kill it

interview yourself over some amazing accomplishment you achieved like becoming the youngest emmy winner and pretending you're really humble.

Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

Pick out an object ahead of me on the footpath and guess which foot will step closest to it

Pee in the garbage at night when I don't want to wake the whole house up.

Fap and when you're done you feel ashamed and feel like you're wasting your life lol

When a song comes on that i hate on the radio, i sing along with it because i know the lyrics. (Example: something by Justtin bieber D:)

When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

has a plastic bag full of plastic bags in your house

Whenever I send or receive texts, I always make it a point to have more received texts than sent ones. It makes me feel popular.

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

My dreams are almost always bizarre in some way - the only time they're ever normal is when they're the premonition type, and then they're about completely uneventful things but accurate down to the tiniest detail.

When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

I apologize, when i bump against things.

I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

hug the pillow at night so it protects me from monsters

When I get the chance, I always nick a chip from my mum's or dad's dinner.

Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.