Sometimes cringe at the sound when other people scratch themselves

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When I get the chance, I always nick a chip from my mum's or dad's dinner.

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When I'm in the shower, I'm afraid something might try to kill me so I shower with my glasses on.

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When walking on stairs, always counting how many of them there are.

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Everytime I look at the clock it see so say 4 20 9 11 or 11 11

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I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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clean my ears with finger if they feel dirty...eat it.

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Stare blankly at your desktop when someone walks in the room so they won't know that you were watching porn lol

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When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

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Go to someone's house and go and ask where something is and the person you ask just tells you without getting up (I know it doesn't go with the theme of this site but its just something annoying)

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Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

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When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

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In school trying to do a small fart because it really hurting and suddnly a earthquake happens

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sometimes i wonder how it would be to think in another language and i try but cant

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I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

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Pee in the shower

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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Create the perfect song/poem/philosophical theory/scientific discovery right before you fall asleep and forget it in the morning.

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I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?

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when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

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I don't like just killing bugs in my home so what I do is I would catch them in a tissue and flush them down my toilet

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When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

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Feel the bed gets more comfortable the longer you put off getting into bed.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.