Never tell her who I was talking to on the phone and watch her nosy butt get upset

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when im alone and in a bad mood i make stupid faces with my eyes closed and try and figure out how stupid i looked. then i start laughing hysterically because i think that im an idiot. then i repeat this process until i have to pee from laughing so hard because im already in the bathroom so why not utilize the toilet, rather than waiting for a commercial and speed-peeing because im scared that i missed some of the show i was watching :D -Grace-

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sing like a pro in da shower

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Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

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When sitting with my laptop on the sofa, and a family member is watching TV in the same room, chuckle occasionally at the screen, just so they know you're not watching porn or something.

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Run back into your room when your microwaving something

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when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

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chew on the side of my teeth

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Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

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Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

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Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

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Likes that girggle sound you make after a burp.

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When I fap at friends house, I use mobile data instead of his wifi incase history can be seen

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Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

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Stare blankly at your desktop when someone walks in the room so they won't know that you were watching porn lol

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after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

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When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.

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push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

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When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

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close one eye or the other to move an object near by when I'm bored -Noel

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Act as if you don't notice her, but you really are dying to take another look at her.

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Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

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I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

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I sometimes deliberately missed buses and trains even if I could easily board them.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.