Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

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When ever my boyfriend doesn't reply to a text for a few hours I always imagine a worse case scenario and end up crying hystaricaly.

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Am I not the one who created an imaginary BAE?

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When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

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Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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you know that when things have only one like on this site, the people who wrote it liked it

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while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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Wondering who would cry at your funeral

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never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

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Create the perfect song/poem/philosophical theory/scientific discovery right before you fall asleep and forget it in the morning.

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Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

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After washing butt, turn my butt towards the shower and spread butt cheeks apart to wash the soap out of my crack.

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When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

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Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

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Search through the most popular section of this website trying to find my one

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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Boring car ride? Read every food & drinks rapper you can find .

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Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

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Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.