Ever played the sims, then wondered if you were just apart of a game and that maybe someone is controlling YOUR every move? Yeah. Me too.

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Try to talk to my pet telepathically. - sky

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When I get the chance, I always nick a chip from my mum's or dad's dinner.

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when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

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When listening to music via headphones in public, I become paranoid that I am bothering everyone around me as my breathing becomes louder without me realising.

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when playing games like grand theft auto I drive normally like all the other people in the game when i'm bored

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Mix up "I'm starving," "I'm freezing," and "I have to pee," in my head, and then say them out loud the wrong way, in times of extreme starving/freezing/needing-to-pee desperation.

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Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

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i see almost everything as a sign

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Likes that girggle sound you make after a burp.

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laziness .... its all in the mind

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Rinse off salted nuts before eating them

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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When I fap at friends house, I use mobile data instead of his wifi incase history can be seen

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Everytime I have ear buds in and I hear myself breathing, I think others can hear it too so I slow my breathing or hold my breath.

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Watching movies about couples with age gaps and woundering how it would feel like to be with somebody much older (or younger) than you. Would they use viagra or would you not even try to have sex with someone so old and delicate?

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When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

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push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

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When you think thoughts, you think them in complete sentences as if you were saying them and in your accent.

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i always think people can hear my thoughts.

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Getting bored when a page is loading and scrolling the wheel on your mouse back and forth one click.

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wait up to 14 days just to find the opportunity to use one, really good, joke.

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When someone is talking to me and I'm not really listening, when it gets quiet I say 'that's crazy' so they think I'm listening.

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Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.