Sometimes I try to solve a math problem using my finger and my thigh, and when I make a mistake a erase it with my hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Decide to think about important things in the shower, but continually lose the train of thought and eventually give up.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Walk into a public bathroom and go to the urinal, but then stop and think theres some guy who will perv on you and then go in the cubicle.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

right before I go to sleep, I think about a certain situation. so I will dream about that

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

To my comment below... Rest im peace MJ... Shhh! Mary Jane is resting!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

play my ipod all night till my eyes hurt

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Make the water from your shower shoot from your finger and pretend to be a water-bender.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I have to put the radio volume in multiples of three and my daughter has to put it in multiples of five so when we are together it either has to be on 15 or 30.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Wherever I drink something, I count how many times I swallow it, and I feel weird if it's not a multiple of 5. I will get more of the drink and drink it, even if I'm not thirsty, just to make my life seem a little more complete...PLEASE tell me I'm not the only one?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

When I go to somewhere like France I always wittily comment to my friend " oh look at all those bloody foreigners as I have always thought they were tougher on immigrants

thumb_up thumb_down -29

only turning the TV volume to numbers ending in 5

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

thumb_up thumb_down -41

When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

thumb_up thumb_down -43

It's hot but I still have on covers

thumb_up thumb_down -43

When you can feel yourself blushing so you pretend to be preoccupied with something else.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.