Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

Everytime I look at the clock it see so say 4 20 9 11 or 11 11

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

Stare blankly at your desktop when someone walks in the room so they won't know that you were watching porn lol

skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

When someone is talking to me and I'm not really listening, when it gets quiet I say 'that's crazy' so they think I'm listening.

Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

When in a public bathroom and others are in there, pretend to fix your clothes/hair until everyone has left before you use it.

Pick out an object ahead of me on the footpath and guess which foot will step closest to it

I imagine that there are lines coming out from things and I don't step on the lines (columns, buildings, walls, corners, etc.)

Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine

When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

get really paranoid when you're in a shop's changing room and try and make sure the curtain is fully closed so nobody can see in

Watching a movie with bugs in it and instantly feeling that shivery 'holy sh*t there are bugs on me' feeling.

I hate other people's mirrors, they make me look different

start planning Halloween costumes on November first.

I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.