Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

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When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

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When you say bye to someone and keep walking in the same direction, and then its really awkward...

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Thinking of a song to get an annoying one out of your head, then realizing that one's even worse.

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Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

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When someone is talking to me and I'm not really listening, when it gets quiet I say 'that's crazy' so they think I'm listening.

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Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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I know it is pointless but still hope to get THUMBS UP

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I imagine that there are lines coming out from things and I don't step on the lines (columns, buildings, walls, corners, etc.)

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I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine

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Finally understand the meaning of a song i used to like as a child....... Im a Barbie girl in a Barbie world-Noel

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get really paranoid when you're in a shop's changing room and try and make sure the curtain is fully closed so nobody can see in

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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When I'm walking along and just trip over my own foot I look back and pretend to look at whatever it was I tripped over.

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You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

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Get to lazy to stand up in the shower so I sit down in the shower

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Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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In case you have the ears pierced, take out the piece, and smell it, even if it smells so bad, you like the how it smells... lol

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If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.