DIY LOL
Anti Joke
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See a news article that looks interesting, too lazy to read the whole thing. Skim.
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-65
I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.
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-65
Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)
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-69
when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.
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-97
Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.
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-99
When it is raining and a sad song comes on the radio, I look out the window and pretend I am in a movie. -Cocobear
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+46
while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.
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+28
In elementary school whenever it was supposed to be mental math I never did it mentally.
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+24
When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up
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+20
when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.
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+14
Always run up the stairs as if someone was chasing you.
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+6
Go to someone's house and go and ask where something is and the person you ask just tells you without getting up (I know it doesn't go with the theme of this site but its just something annoying)
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+4
I sometimes feel someone is watching me and speak towards it in a calming tone, only to again speak to myself telling myself im just being silly... only to turn my head and look behind me just in case.
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-2
Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.
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-10
when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say
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-16
When in a public bathroom and others are in there, pretend to fix your clothes/hair until everyone has left before you use it.
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-20
Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back
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-22
Walk into a public bathroom and go to the urinal, but then stop and think theres some guy who will perv on you and then go in the cubicle.
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-22
Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.
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-22
chewing icecream before you swallow it
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-24
I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine
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-24
Finally understand the meaning of a song i used to like as a child....... Im a Barbie girl in a Barbie world-Noel
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-28
Wherever I drink something, I count how many times I swallow it, and I feel weird if it's not a multiple of 5. I will get more of the drink and drink it, even if I'm not thirsty, just to make my life seem a little more complete...PLEASE tell me I'm not the only one?
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-30
When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge
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-32
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.