- Things You Think Only You Do

Smell a fart and don't react until someone else does.

think that you are wasting way too much time on this website and that you could be exercising right now or be doing a million more productive things than righting about doing more productive things on things you think only you do.

I put a small amount of water in glasses and freeze them for hot days when I want a cool drink

Every new years eve I like to watch the date on my computer change all three the day, the month, and the year

In case you have the ears pierced, take out the piece, and smell it, even if it smells so bad, you like the how it smells... lol

Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

I mute music videos and watch them to completely different music.

Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

wonder who wrote these things

When listening to music via headphones in public, I become paranoid that I am bothering everyone around me as my breathing becomes louder without me realising.

If I am waiting on someone and they are late, I start mentally listing their faults, flaws and mistakes but feel kind of bad for doing it when they finally show up.

Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

Stare blankly at your desktop when someone walks in the room so they won't know that you were watching porn lol

do math problems in my head while having sex to keep from coming

I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine

Saving my cash this year and not buying into the shopping hype

Swirling your hair through your hair while something is loading.

When realizing i'm being a little bitchy, I laugh and smile right after my sentence to make myself seem a little nicer.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.