Stepping on a LEGO block and instantly screaming and leap onto the bed.

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Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

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Play poly-rhythmic drum beats along with my turn signal on my car.

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Likes that girggle sound you make after a burp.

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When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

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I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

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clean my ears with finger if they feel dirty...eat it.

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Read this site's posts, think of something awesome to write but then forget it because you decided to read more and finish the page rather than write it immediately.

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I feel no shame that I am a camgirl online and bring in about $2800 a month just to flash guys my boobs. :)

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It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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When I go to bed, I imagine how I would deal with intruders, then I can't sleep.

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When you say bye to someone and keep walking in the same direction, and then its really awkward...

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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Feel like puhing the crap out of people who talk loud in public places.

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Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.

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think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

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I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

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I pee in the shower. :3

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I know it is pointless but still hope to get THUMBS UP

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Dance in the car just so the person you like will see you and be like "Aw, cute" but then they don't even see you so you stop...

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To my comment below... Rest im peace MJ... Shhh! Mary Jane is resting!

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I imagine that there are lines coming out from things and I don't step on the lines (columns, buildings, walls, corners, etc.)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.