Do sex sensations feel exactly the same for the opposite sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

This song will not come out of my head!

thumb_up thumb_down -47

pluck dried pieces of poop in your butt hair

thumb_up thumb_down -47

When my cat follows me, I pretend we're a pack or some sort of gang and i would be the leader.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Hit the off button on the microwave three times to simulate the sound it makes when time is up.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

When I drop something, I stand there and watch it fall, I stand still because I'm afraid that I'll maybe mess up something else, instead of picking it up quickly. Am I the only one? ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -51

I mute music videos and watch them to completely different music.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

If I'm alone, I'll imagine myself as somebody else an start acting as if I'm in a different life, complete with different people and places because in my imagination, I get to control what is going to happen next. Because, my imagination is way better than my reality.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

sing like a pro in da shower

thumb_up thumb_down -53

I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

thumb_up thumb_down -65

I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

thumb_up thumb_down -85

when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

thumb_up thumb_down -97

Stare blankly at your desktop when someone walks in the room so they won't know that you were watching porn lol

thumb_up thumb_down -119

while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

In elementary school whenever it was supposed to be mental math I never did it mentally.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I sometimes feel someone is watching me and speak towards it in a calming tone, only to again speak to myself telling myself im just being silly... only to turn my head and look behind me just in case.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Create the perfect song/poem/philosophical theory/scientific discovery right before you fall asleep and forget it in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Has anyone else ever wondered why the women in shows and movies lie with the blanket covering them after apparently having sex with the other person.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Stepping on a concrete sidewalk square the exact amount of times as the others.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.