recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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Walk into a public bathroom and go to the urinal, but then stop and think theres some guy who will perv on you and then go in the cubicle.

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I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

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sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

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I know it is pointless but still hope to get THUMBS UP

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Get a mini heart attack when your rocking on your chair and you nearly fall off

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When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

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When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

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Hum up and down in pitch because it makes LED displays dance around.

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Saving my cash this year and not buying into the shopping hype

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

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Have deja vu while talking to someone and then stop listening to what they are saying for a few seconds till the feeling passes, then nod like you have been listening the whole time.

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When your alone in the house you walk around naked even though there is no point

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When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

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Boring car ride? Read every food & drinks rapper you can find .

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You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

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My daily agenda: wake up take a crap get out of bed...

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Do sex sensations feel exactly the same for the opposite sex.

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wonder if famous singers are actually the one that sings the song, or if someone else records it in the studio and then they lip sync at concerts.

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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When a person tells you: Oh you like Lana Del Rey? Me:No,I like the wall

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Talk out loud so my brother can hear me because no one ever wrote that they can read your minds. And i want him to know ineed him in my life still so I randomly say things out loud to him on accident. People always look at me with hidden shock wide eyed.

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This song will not come out of my head!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.