When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

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Stop at traffic lights thinking it will close soon, when actually remains only 5s to close second and u run like crazy.

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

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Sometimes when walking, accidently fart and then try to squeak my to sound like my shoes squeaked instead of me farting.

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When i see people even strangers , in my mind i wonder if there virgins or not .

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read some comments here and wonder if people really do that

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forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

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I Never read the Terms of Service but click the box anyway .

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Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

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Search up google on bing or yahoo because i feel that google is so much better

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when you mouth words (but saying them out loud) when someone can't hear you

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I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

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When you're bored or alone, you think of an argument you had with a friend recently, then think of all the things you should've said and get all powered up inside, but then you realise it's too late -_-

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Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

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When eating chips I always look at each side before eating it to choose which side will taste better

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I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

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When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

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i always fall in my imaginations. whenever i think of something, e.g me walking to my room, i'd fall on my way there. what's wrong with me.....

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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When pooping I always fold my TP before. Anyone else do that? I also always have 4 squares each XD Email me if you do it :P mr.michaelgiorgio@gmail.com

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When i'm home alone with the dog i have a conversation with the dog, sometimes in my head & sometimes out loud, in the voice that i think the dog would have if it could speak. Then sometimes i realise that i haven't checked if anybody else is home !

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Having gay sex

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stare at someones face until they distort and then wonder why they are asking me why I'm smiling.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.