Only I CAN TYPE FUCKlNG FUCKlNG FUCKlNG AS MANY FUCKlNG TIMES I FUCKlNG WANT! Moral the friendly r*pist: FUCKlNG COOL!

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Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

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When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

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When I make croissants from the Pillsbury can, I'll take one of the little triangles and eat it, because I like the consistency of dough, and i like the fizzy feeling of the yeast on my tongue.

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when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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Pee in the shower

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Hit the enter key really hard when finishing a long piece of text that you have just written.

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Thinking of a song to get an annoying one out of your head, then realizing that one's even worse.

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Go to the same website two days in a row and then never again after that

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I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

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I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?

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I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

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When I create a situation in my mind where someone is making me mad, then I actually get mad.

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I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

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Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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When I'm walking along and just trip over my own foot I look back and pretend to look at whatever it was I tripped over.

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when going through this website only read post that have 2 or more thumbs up

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having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.