While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

When you think thoughts, you think them in complete sentences as if you were saying them and in your accent.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

i always think people can hear my thoughts.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

bounce when your tip toeing.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Go to the same website two days in a row and then never again after that

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

thumb_up thumb_down -19

When you're alone in a room and you have to turn on the TV so it's not as silent...

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Raising your hand in class, and once you're called on, you say, "I forgot."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Sometimes, I have a hard time looking people I know in the eyes but have no trouble looking strangers in the eyes. I wish I knew why. Help!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I sometimes start moving my hands around "making them fight" pretending they are tiny fighters.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

thumb_up thumb_down -29

THINK OF SOMETHING WEIRD YOU DO TO PUT ON THIS WEBSITE ONLY TO END UP FORGETTING IT BEFORE YOU GET ON THE COMPUTER

thumb_up thumb_down -29

When your alone in the house you walk around naked even though there is no point

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

I am 23 and I still wish the stalk will take back my younger brother

thumb_up thumb_down -39

My dreams are almost always bizarre in some way - the only time they're ever normal is when they're the premonition type, and then they're about completely uneventful things but accurate down to the tiniest detail.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

when you get a runny nose suddenly checks for blood oh good its clear

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Check the lint filter on the dryer every time I walk into the laundry room.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.